My life

[nightsky]

I am Terilyn. I am 22 years old now. I started having bad problems with depression at 17 and was diagnosed with depression then. I didn't want to be put on any medication at the time and spoke with a counselor for a few sessions. Right now I can't afford a counselor or I probably would be seeing one.
My situation with my family is very rough. I was always considered very smart and made straight As though out high school. I would be punished and screamed at, etc. every time I made lower than an A, even if it was on a 5 point quiz. They have always been very critical of me. After I moved out of the house things had gotten better with my family but have recently worsened again.
I am currently 5'3 and weigh 304 pounds. 3 years ago I weighed 156 pounds at my heaviest. I gained all of my weight quickly and while exercising and eating healthy. It has since been determined that I have insulin resistance and a thyroid problem and medications are helping me lose the weight. My family however, thinks I sit at home and eat ice cream while watching TV all day. My mom still makes comments like this and she comes into the doctor with me.
Today was the worst and is what made me search out these forums. I am at my aunt's house because I am helping take care of my mom who broke her knee cap. This is on my much looked forward to break from school that I really needed. I have been very stressed out lately and feeling like I am falling into depression again. Then today's situation happened. I sat down on my aunt's sofa and it creaked. My family freaked out. They yelled and cussed at me for a very long time. I have also been told that I am no longer allowed to sit on any furniture in the house other than the hard backed wooden kitchen chair or I can sit on the floor. They told me if I loose 100 pounds I can sit on the sofa again. My heart just cracked. This happened several hours ago and I can't seem to even stop crying to look at the situation. I went back in the room with them and asked to sit and was refused and then cussed out for crying. I know I should just brush this off but I can't seem too. Everything is just hitting me and I don't know what to do.

[Mich]

That is terrible. I am so sorry that your family is treating you this way. It breaks my heart to think of your family being so mean to you. You have grown up in a pressure-filled home and now you are being pressured to lose weight in order to be accepted. Please know that you are accepted and cared for here.
What would happen if you sat quietly with your mother and told her that her words were harsh and really hurt you?
I hope you post again and let us know how you are doing today (Monday).

[dandelion]

hello Terilyn,
Im glad that you found this forum. I hope this step will help you alot to cope with your problems now. It breaks my heart to read what you wrote about how your family treated you. Somehow i can relate so much...and i know it must have hurt you so bad. How i wish your family would treat you better than they now, you deserve to be treated well! so well. I wish i have something to said to you to make you feel better, but maybe ignore them would be the good. You prove to them that you are strong and that they will never let you down with their words and actions, keep doing what you are doing now, exercising and eat healthy. Some people like to criticise than to understand and its hard to make them understand that we dont have any control towards certain things. I hope thing are looking up for you hun

Love
dandelion