the warrior

[xn728]

lifting his head from his slumber the warrior looks all around him ,the smell of death burns
his nostrels ,behind him the demons he has battled to get to this hill ,the vantage point
he must try and hold ,the rotting carcasses dont die though ,even now a he veiws this dismal
scence ,the monsters from within his mind rise from the smelling rotting pile ,this power the
warrior does not have ,and the battle has left him weak ,and his mind trys to tell him to take
the walk ,promise,s it will be good behind the door cmon lets take a look ,the warrior stands
uneasily ,the visitor held him on the bed ,while his daughter died from an ashma attack
when he woke from this nightmare ,so real, he cryed and wished to see no more ,back on the hill
tired and suffering terrible attacks from the foul beasts the warrior looks toward the mountains he can
see streching before him ,the visitor stands with him ,without motion or speech ,the commander of
the dark army ,tells the warrior these mountains you see spreading out before you ,they are the
mountains you will climb till the day you die ,peace you will never know ,you will walk the earth forever
with pain in your soul and tears in your heart ,walk with your wife as you do ,smiling and crying at the same
moment ,she never speaks of this ,but she does see the pain ,the lost soul drifting in the breeze of
his twilight world,she sees the warrior to and fears he might die ,left alone forever,reaching for him in
the cold lonely night ,never to feel his warmth again ,the warrior drops to his knees ,no longer able to stand
the screams of the demon army behind him ,now all standing again risen from death ,so much effort he took to
make them fall ,and without effort they stand again waiting ,watching listening ,for the dark one
to send them into battle once more .the visitor demands ,give me the weapon .you use to lay waste the darkness
i send to you ,the very thing i need to complete your downfall ,my final prize ,the warrior bloodied and
weary rose slowly to his feet ,trembling inside ,but steady not to show the fear .looked to the visitor and said
the part of me you wish to have ,the piece of sanaty i keep safely within my mind ,were even you cannot reach
,to give you this would be to much of a sacrifice ,i would strike myself and fall here and let the blood flow
from my body ,this you will never have ,to much of me you have already ,the warrior turned his back on the visitor
and started towards the mountains ,many footsteps he heard behind him ,the demons will tear at his flesh again
but he must walk on slaying the beasts as he move forward ,never ending ,never resting ,an end to this he cannot
see ,and when he does fall,will he see rest ,or will the hourds trample him and leave no trace, xn728

[crystalgaze]

(((((Ken)))) I feel similarly.... I just wanted you to know I did read your post. I am not sure what to say.... & so.... ((((Ken)))))

Edit: You know.... I had an odd thought..... I'm going to try to channel my so as not to fall/topple in my moment of being a tired warrior as well....

I don't like to give in to it... but it has already happened.... It seems as though it is automatic. It comes for me whenever there is a need to preserve myself immediately.

Do you think that our "evil" from all those years ago can be used to do away with our current monsters?

[xn728]

returning to the mortal coil, im just so upset ,i,have told my love ,i have a headache and need to lay down ,suspicious but concerned eyes greet me ,
are you sure thats all ,yeah ,yeah ,dont worry ,so i will go to the cool dark room ,and weep secretly ,but with dignity ,but i have a confession
and it may change things forever ,for as strong as i am ,feeling as i do today ,if i was not needed by my loved ones ,and i do love them with my life , i would have gladly killed myself today ,
i will go now and hope for a couple of hours rest ,is that two much ,or is this the final push ,pherhaps a stroke ,or even heart attack ,but not by my own hand ,the thoughts hurt but they cant kill me . and i know your all around but sometimes i cant see thanks c
Fran you must hold my hand and never let go .and if i struggle while sleeping in the night wake me ,from that fall i always take .hold me my love hold me ,,,,,,,,ken xn728

[Mich]

Ken - I wish I had adequate words of comfort and I wish that I could ease this suffering that you endure. Remember all those that love you at home and on the board and keep fighting. Do not surrender.

[xn728]

dont worry just resting today ,im so tired ,and i may have overdone the meds ,i post later KEN