everything's changed so fast

[jakeS]

Hey my first ever time posting on a forum but I just need someone to listen really

So a little back story. Before I met my now ex fiance my day would consist of playing online games like world of warcraft and just be all alone. At the time I had no problem at all I didn't know any better I was happy

One day I met my ex fiance through my friends she was just like me and my whole life changed she moved in and we spent every day being in love just cuddling watching movies and so forth but then her family turned on me because they missed there daughter even though they treated her like crap. So there was a huge fall out between me and the family
My ex fiance then went to look after her sister because she tried to commit suicide after er date left her. The day before she was coming back home my ex fiance was so excited to see me but then the day after she rang me up and asaid she don't want to be with me. Her family apparently rang and said she shouldn't throw her life away and should leave me for good.

Now im all alone with no one to share my day with. I suffer from social anxiety and hate partying. Im a nerd and probably average in looks. I only want serious relationships.

Looking at all those factors im afraid im going to be alone again im scared that im too wierd to find someone I just find myself depressed and alone cuddling a pillow at night to feel less alone. I just.....want a happy loving relationhship that ends in marriage and kids but im to wierd and struggle to socialize with someone for weeks......ps im male

[catcog]

Jake: sorry to hear that your relationship ended and that you're down. It doesn't sound that the two of you had a seriously sustainable lifestyle (such a realization probably doesn't make you feel any better). It's concerning that you seem to feel you NEED someone in order to be happy. Sure, having a significant other can be nice. . . . but being in a relationship can also be a real pain in the ---. My advice is to use this experience to learn to enjoy being by yourself. It's always painful when a serious relationship ends; and the pain always eases up over time.

Definately make a point to get out of the house EVERY day and to connect with friends and/or family members in person daily. Face-to-face social contact is key in warding off depression. Make a list of things you'd like to do and then start doing those things. (Even if you were in a relationship, chances are your partner wouldn't be into everything you like anyway). Think of all those things you couldn't comfortably do while you were in a relationship.

Developing the ability to enjoy being by yourself will make you more appealing/less 'needy'. People aren't attracted by neediness. In time you will likely find that special someone; but if you don't it won't be a huge deal because you will learn to be happy on your own.

Best wishes. You WILL feel better over time. . . .especially if you make a point to get out and socialize.