Dont know where to start

[mritz]

Long story short I attempted suicide during Thanksgiving vacation with family & friends. I ended up spending half of my vacation in a hospital. Sadly I dont remember what happened over a 2-3 day period. I am currently and have been seeing a psychologist and psychiatrist for years.

My family has been great. At first I thought it was a joke, I dont remember trying to kill myself. I had an argument with a friend during vacation and ingested my entire bottle of Xanax. I am trying to put my life back together, but my friend will not take my calls or answer any messages or texts that I have sent her. I have struggled with depression/OCD for as long as I can remember. I dont know how to move forward. I keep telling myself that maybe I should stop by her house. Maybe her cell phone isnt working. I am having a very difficult time accepting what has happened and her reaction. Any suggestions or how to let this go or do I continue to pursue her for closure? I feel like I have no one to talk to about this. My husband doesnt understand. I cant simply "let it go". My mind wont accept that and I am experiencing an incredible amout of anxiety. I have known her for 7 yrs and I cant imagine her just "writing me off". At times I feel extreme panic over this and cant go a day without thinking about the situation and what I should do.

[Mich]

I am so sorry that you had so much pain that you felt you had to end your life. I do understand it though. I believe your friend is hurting too and just does not know what to say to you. I believe she will come around in time.