husband depressed

Depression/anxiety may have touched your family, your friends, yourself; what helps you to deal with it? Sharing is caring!

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loz4082
Posts: 1
Joined: Wed Dec 03, 2014 4:37 pm

husband depressed

Postby loz4082 » Wed Dec 03, 2014 4:42 pm

My husband of three years has been depressed on and off since our son was born 18 months ago, I am pregnant with our second and its getting worse. He says I don't love him, he is unhappy and goes through periods of time where he either ignores me or is foul to me. He doesn't recognise he has issues and as such refuses help. I have tried various approaches with no luck and am at the point of lwaving for the sake of the children. Any advice on helping him get the right help?

100footpole
Posts: 477
Joined: Fri Oct 03, 2014 1:26 pm

Postby 100footpole » Wed Dec 03, 2014 7:24 pm

You need to find a professional to ask ... I'm sure there are best practices for this.

I suggested counseling to my wife ... and she's suggested it to me when things were bad. The first time was when my son was less than one ... the second time was when he was over 16.

She couldn't get along with the baby ... I couldn't get along with the teenager.

You need to make the right choice for yourself and your kids.

CrazyKiss
Posts: 45
Joined: Mon Nov 17, 2014 2:30 pm
Location: South West

Postby CrazyKiss » Mon Dec 29, 2014 12:18 pm

I'm sorry to hear that ur husband is suffering from Depression. I know none of us can prepare for the worse to happen in life cuz will never be ready for it and as for ur husband having depression u never knew till now that after ur son was born he became depressed. Depression can come at anytime in our life's so it's knowing the signs before u can do anything else.

I'm glad to know that ur trying to be there for ur husband but it must be hard for u knowing u can't reach out to anyone cuz he doesn't want the help or listen to what u got to say apart from taking it out on u etc but u need to remember that the only way someone would be willing to get help for any reason is to hear it from them first.

I know irs hard to accept and I know u dont want ur husband to go through this alone though he isn't as he has the support from u and his other family. All u can do is remind him that ur there for him and if he ever wants to talk then ur always there for him.

Please dont think that none of this is ur fault. It does seem like it's effecting u two and that's understandable so for u to try deal with these emotions u could always look into Counselling for urself as this may help u to get things off ur chest. You atleast have someone to talk to and u will be able to cope better in urself and for the sake of the kids.

I'm not sure what the real reason is to why ur husband is depressed but only he can say. The last thing u want to do is make him open up to u. You have to respect his feelings and ways of dealing with things.

If u would like any further help to regards of Depression u can always do some research or maybe get in contact with other services who would be able to help u understand about this a little bit more but do try to speak to someone about how ur feeling first. Also I'm not sure this is a good idea but could u maybe make an out of hours appointment to see doctor for ur husband so that u don't need to force him to go anywhere or speak to anyone outside of home? That may get him to open up that way.

Apart from that all u can do us be there for ur husband and keep the family together as good as u can and can't do no more. Do try the following options I have given u as one or two could be the answer to this.

Remember that despite everything what's going on I know deep down ur husband still loves u even if it dont feel that way. You need to remember that.

Keep reaching out on here two.

hideaway
Posts: 4
Joined: Mon Dec 29, 2014 8:00 am

Re: husband depressed

Postby hideaway » Wed Dec 31, 2014 5:14 am

loz4082 wrote:My husband of three years has been depressed on and off since our son was born 18 months ago, I am pregnant with our second and its getting worse. He says I don't love him, he is unhappy and goes through periods of time where he either ignores me or is foul to me. He doesn't recognise he has issues and as such refuses help. I have tried various approaches with no luck and am at the point of lwaving for the sake of the children. Any advice on helping him get the right help?


Put the kids first. That's the only advice I feel capable to give. Even if it means leaving him.

SkaterDrew
Posts: 37
Joined: Wed Jan 07, 2015 9:55 pm

Postby SkaterDrew » Fri Jan 09, 2015 9:42 pm

If you can't reach out to him, try to find him a professional to help.
Just always be there for him, depression is really not an easy to cope with, so he'll need you all the time.

LuisSteven
Posts: 29
Joined: Mon Mar 02, 2015 3:43 am

Postby LuisSteven » Mon Mar 02, 2015 4:32 am

Introduce the idea of joining a depression support group. This will give them an outlet for discussing their problems and receiving input, and help them to discover that there are other (normal) people experiencing similar problems. There are depression support groups everywhere. Make sure that you find one that is positive and focused on recovery. Inward looking, pessimistic groups can be unhelpful.


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