Depression Understood Forums

Okay. From a previous post, I said I would tell more about the "gift".

Recap: I said that it's more like heightened instinct/awareness or a kind of sensitivity. Personally, I don't think of mine as being 'psychic'. I can't predict things exactly...

How Mine Works:
(It almost looks rational.)

Part I

{1} I have a feeling.
{2} Then, I have a thought about it.
{3} Then, I wonder if it means any thing.
{4} It (my instinct) tells me or I figure out what it is.

or

Part II

{1} I have a thought.
{2} Then I have a feeling.
{3} Then, I wonder if it means any thing.
{4} It (my instinct) tells me or I figure out what it is.


The thought/feeling from {1} in Parts I & II usually starts off based on some kind of information I know (e.g. someone told it to me, which is usually about themselves).

It also comes to me in the form of:

{a} "Something isn't right here".
{b} "What's not right?"
{c} I think about the situation/event/thought & go through a list of things I think it might be. Usually, I am told what it is when I think about it or say it aloud.

{d} For items on the list, I usually know which 1 it is because I will get a strong feeling about it--a sort of "This is it.../It's this 1." or "Eureka..."

Is the voice my own...? I have no idea... It's not external, though. The best way to describe it is that there is an extra 'something' there. Singing is probably the best example I could give for this. In lots of songs today, there's a lead singer & backup singer/vocal(s). Well, I have a backup singer for {d}. It usually chimes in there & it usually is correct--if not now, then later on down the road.

~lol~ Just for the record, I don't do drugs of any kind. I don't usually even drink alcohol or when I do, I don't drink much. I also don't look at a lot of television. I don't play video games as much anymore. Maybe I played them for about a year & then stopped. What I play now is about 1 or 2 games now: Sudoku & FFVII.


***

There is a 2nd part to the "gift", which is negative for me. Sometimes, it's not so organized... Or dare I say 'rational'?

This irrational type has given me utter terror, stress & panic at times.... I got that kind a few times in the last month & as recently as a few days ago, which is why you'll see me turn into an almost incessant worrywart or become an emotional wreck. I don't usually get this about myself, though, but there have been a few notable times.

Sometimes, it's very unclear (like there's fog & I can't make out any thing). However, it has been correct or somewhat correct on some level on several different occasions.


***

~lol~ I think I ask myself, "Well... Jeez, now... What am I supposed to do with all of this?"

It is often very hard for me to be near people, based on all the things that I feel (the 'vibrations', I guess it could be called).... This can protect us both--me & the other person/people--although it can be a hard road.

Yet, it's protected me from harm or being around people who would harm me. Most times, if I can meet the person face to face & talk to them, I will usually get a feeling about him/her. If it isn't certain, I'll get an "I don't know/I'm not sure/I can't tell just yet" or a "something isn't right here".

I think that basically covers every thing for now.

Your "voice" sounds like what some may term a "spirit guide"

this is deep stuff onika ,and we,ll some of the meanings i find ,mmmm
unclear ,bad news ,is there a message here ,am i just not looking hard enough ,or maybe i am seeing what is here mmm,,,differant people could see things in differant ways here ,i to am good at working things out and
maybe i,ll look again ,,,ken

Oh yes... I did forget to mention this....

As for the family, my dad has a bit of the voice also. He's said things that's happened right before our eyes seconds/minutes later. We just sort of laugh about it 'cause we can't believe it (while we try to pick up our jaws from off the ground). We're usually just so shocked about how it happens. We sort of look at each other like, "Can you believe it?"

My grandmother & perhaps her mother are said to have a special something by people in the community, but I do not believe my grandmother (in particular) used hers properly. She now has dementia, so I wouldn't be able to ask her any thing about it.

these words could have many meanings ,to lot of differant minds ,the bit about trust and being unsure of someone ,yes ive read it again and now i understand much better now . xn728

hi crystal /onika ,its been a while ,hope you ok ,a better feeling soon i hope ,,,,,,,,,,xn ken

your absence ,is hard to take ,i miss your words ,and the fact your not here makes the forum feel a little chilly ,im sure i speak for everyone ,onika
crystalgaze ,but your return will warm us all ,when i see you have returned home to us here you will see me light the fire ,and the family
will be complete again ,christmas is a terrible time for me ,and many of us will feel the same ,i wasnt here last year ,but i aim to be here for you all this time round ,you all have your fears ,but we will travel this road together ,i do wish we are complete by then ,as one we can survive
but if we travel together nothing can harm us and we can overcome
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,best wishes everyone ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,ken ,,,,,,

Hi there Ken! Thank you for all of your posts.

I am trying a thing here. Still not really feeling that great, but doing my best to work with it.

Still can't verbalize what it is yet.... I wish it wouldn't take so long to reveal itself! Maybe it knows I'm not ready for it.... Hhmm...

Battling a slight headache... Today was a rough morning....

im happy to see you today ,i wanted you to come home to something nice
ive missed your presance here ,and so will everyone else ,you take your time ,ive lost my power of words but i will stay calm and hopefully ,they will return ,its feels a little warmer in here now the chill has gone ,,,ken

hey onika ,things are pretty queit on the forum just now ,a lot of illness and pain ,i hope your ok ,and look forward to you posting ,when your ready of course ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,ken

The gift has settled down quite a bit, since I started taking the vitamins + minerals I tried out last month.

It is still there, but it is allowing me to live.

Currently, it is making a bit of a stir in my life.... There have just been too many odd things this past week.

((( crystal ))))

Oh yes, that sometimes happens to me, first, have to feel it then I subconscious tell myself on how their thinking, instinct? maybe.

As for now, your eyes tell me a bit of yourself, your spirit tells me who you are.

Crystal, i sometimes like to make a stir in my life.... then jump right in the middle. Makes things interesting.