What if...8

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Tealeaves
Posts: 75
Joined: Wed May 05, 2021 3:54 am

What if...8

Postby Tealeaves » Sun Jan 15, 2023 7:25 pm

What if...8

in the beginning we're made equally unequal

We all have two sides, some people may refer to them as left brain/right brain but I get them confused, which one is which... so I just call them emotional and functional... plus I don't think it's actually left brain/right brain as we know it.( I don't know, I can't do the research on it)
And what I'm asking you to see is something that you cannot see...meaning; as far as I'm aware of can't open someone's head and actually see this happening but, either in this post or later post I will give you real life examples; as well as; some television show examples. ( just because someone is acting doesn't mean that they aren't showing something real)

Moving on, these two sides give us the ability to yes, think and feel but ...also a whole lot more.
(Warning: some of this is going to sound like...duh...but hang in there)

Some definitions/words for functional:
Law, facts, truth, instant gratification, need, need to know what to expect, numbers...especially #1, things making sense, order, selfish, real, what is, seeing is believing, memory and, action...the ability to move and do.

Some definitions/words for emotional:
Changeable, questioning, want, roll with it, imagination, what if, believing is seeing, selfless, abstract, the ability to create never seen before

Technically, words, are on the functional side but how we use them is emotional.

There are more definitions and words but, we'll cross those bridges as we come to them.

So far this is the best way that I can come up with for explaining this but if you can come up with something better... then oh happy day please share.

Remember the manual scale at the doctors office, the one you had to move the pointer pieces until it balanced? Well that's kind of what I picture in my head not quite but close enough.

Everyone has this Emotional/Functional scale...by nature...one side is stronger than the other. Most people on average are between 40% and 60%...meaning, close to half.

There are also the above average, with their stronger side being up to about 70%. Since they are not almost 50/50 they are very recognizable. As an example I will use the show Bones. Even though it is fictitious in some ways, it is also based on a real-life person. Anyone whom has seen that show, probably thought of somebody that they know personally... similar to her character...meaning, they said "Hey, I know someone like."
Being higher on the scale, does not necessarily make you smarter or, more creative, if you're stronger on the emotional side... it's simply means more definitions from that side. Definitions can become stronger, depending on what makes sense/feels good, to your mind. For example if it makes sense to your mind to study and retain facts, the naturally you'll probably be considered smarter.
Also, please keep in mind, what makes sense to you is not always the same as what makes sense to your brain. If you must, think of it like conscious versus subconscious. That is not actually how it works, I can explain it later if need be... but, for conversation sake, just so you have an idea to anchor to.

These values are; I believe; are set from birth/creation.They give us the ability, not only to reason but, to also be unreasonable, selfish/selfless etc..
You can see evidence of the two sides from birth but you really start seeing it...around a year.
So of course the crying and laughter are big signs because, who cries or laughs as much as children ...but so is "MINE". Anyone who has children or, has been around children is quite familiar with "MINE." It's selfish, it's the functional side. You are trying to teach a child to, share with another child but, their reaction is "it's mine" or "no."
All while the little eyes look up at you saying 'why...or why should I?'
Of course in time that child will probably learn the lesson... as the emotional crying and laughter, begins lessening; creating an imbalance in the scales; so too does the functional selfishness; righting the imbalance.

Something that is very important...being imbalanced, is just as important and needed, as being balanced. An imbalance, gives us the chance, the opportunity to... see what life is like on the other side... to walk a mile in someone else's shoes ...to see something through someone else's eyes.
So back to the example with the toddler...(my apologies to anyone without children/around children, for using so many children examples. Please bear with me)
While the child is refusing to share, the adult is probably looking at them/tone of speaking, with reprimand or, disappointment or, sadness. The child seeing/hearing this is now imbalanced. What makes sense in their little brain...makes sense to them but, obviously not to this adult looking at them. ( I am not in the mind of a child so I can't really see any of this for sure but we'll just pretend) the child seeing this reasons (what is) this adult feeds me. (What if) they stop feeding me?
Or... there is always the good old force... meaning the adult takes the toy from the first child...giving it to the second child...at the same time as they give the other child's toy to the first child... forcing them to share but more importantly, forcing their mind to ... try something outside... of what makes sense to their brain.
Child is imbalanced while the two sides start working back and forth, while the two sides work back and forth between what is reasonable/not reasonable; as well as; what feels good/not feels good...hurts.
In this particular case this child realizes they're able to play with their toy and they're also able to play with the other toy and that's more fun than just playing with one toy...which makes sense and it feels good... the imbalance has been balanced
Well that is until a minute later the toy breaks...which doesn't make sense and hurts. The adult picks them up, cuddling and saying lunchtime...a word the child has learned to recognize...which does make sense and feels good. ( subconsciously this might also calm the child's earlier thought of, the adult not feeding them)
Until the adult says the word broccoli ...which that doesn't make sense...

Okay yeah I could go on and on but,  hopefully you get it... And that back and forth does not stop, at any point, during our whole life.
Getting cut off on the highway on our way to work... doesn't make sense and upsets us. Tell a coworker and they agree with you... that makes sense and it makes you smile.
The two sides are constantly going back and forth, even decisions as simple as going to the bathroom involves back and forth between the two sides. The fact or what is... nature calls. The questioning or, what if ...can I hold it? What is... I'm in the car, not at home. What if... I can make it to the next exit? What is... I know there's a gas station at the next exit. Which makes you smile because you have a reasonable plan... it makes sense and it feels good... Well it will after you get to the next exit.

Now I'm going to cover one more thing and even though there is more lol, a lot more...that's good for now.

What the imbalance does.
The imbalance, when it gets stuck. The scales, when they get flipped.

I warn you, without further research, I'm a little iffy on how some of this works. I know I'm on to it, I just need further work on it, to finish the links or, connections between things.
And just like I said earlier about the scales explanation... once you understand this theory, if you have a better way to explain it then you are more than welcome to share it.

The imbalance, causes the two sides to work incorrectly. The more or, longer, that you are imbalanced, the more or, longer, that the two sides work incorrectly...even backwards.

Times where you should be selfish instead you're selfless...and vice versa.
For example, I know this woman... she constantly lets friends; that are down on their luck; move in. They do not pay rent, even when asked. They do not help around the home, even when asked. They bring dangerous and illegal items, into her home.
( sounds like a, her problem, right... I would agree except, she has a son.
He goes to the fridge and there's nothing to eat because the visitors ate it. He wants new shoes but he doesn't get them (or the shoes he wants) because the visitors use the electric and water more and that bill has to be paid... which the visitors do not pay that either.
Do you see the backward? She should be selfish and keep her home to herself and her son.

Yes I realized by using the word selfish it sounds negative because most the time we do think of being selfish/ selfless as negative /positive... but as you can see in the above example being selfish is the positive thing.
( and I say it this way because... aren't there people out there that would say "how selfish of you to have a nice warm home and turn away those poor people that now have to live on the streets or beg somewhere else." )

You see it's when you're over selfish or even over selfless... that it becomes a problem.

If need be, I'm sure it can come up with more examples but, hopefully, you get the idea of how the imbalance, can work backwards.


Stuck imbalance:

Life happens...and there is no pause button.
Sometimes, something happens that does not make sense and, it hurts... your mind needs time to mull it over... figure it out but... there is no pause button. Like it or not, life continues moving forward.
So it throws it on the back burner

(This is one of the places that gets iffy because I'm not exactly sure how the mind distinguishes between big problems and little problems and what the effect and, affect is. How there is the daily imbalance and the back burner or stuck, imbalance.
Also, I do not have an universal way of describing it... meaning one that everyone could understand...except generally)

1st an example of a stuck imbalance, righting itself.

A kid's parents get divorced... he's a kid he does not understand why and is left questioning. Now he is imbalanced but, it's put on the back burner. He has a fairly normal life except little blips here and there and, he has commitment issues. Eventually, he gets married, has kids of his own. Later on, he gets divorced.
Now he is the parent, explaining divorce to the children...now he has answers...the kid him had asked.
The adult man may not realize that the imbalance is fixed but, it is. At least it is in this example.

Unfortunately there are no alarm bells or jackpot music playing whenever a long stuck imbalance is fixed, so we don't always know. Sometimes we just wake up with a different sense about ourselves. Maybe a moment of clarity hits us, leaving us saying "well duh, that makes sense...hmm, I never thought of it that way before" funny thing is, what you're thinking about has nothing to do what originally caused the imbalance or,  what righted it...completely unrelated.

2nd example

When a child watches their parent walk out the door... there is typically evidence of where that parent went.
For example parents going to the grocery store or work... later there's evidence of food in the refrigerator,  lights can be turned on, which means the bills are paid. Not that the children are always able to figure this out, on their own but... the parents or, adults around them, are constantly reminding them. "I work and I pay bills so you can have nice things...so go clean that pig sty of a room...now!"
Of course children don't want their parents to leave...you know..."MINE" ... but in time do they understand... especially due to the evidence.
But what if there is no evidence... the parent still disappears...
The parent might even tell the child that they love them and they want to be around them all the time ...they just can't.
Now add to that, the possibility that, the child hears the hushed voices of the other family members, bottles that they are not supposed to drink from, substances in drawers that they are not allowed to touch and numerous other clues that leaves a curious child...with questions.

One big question...what's out there that is more important to you...than me?

In time the child adds more clues and now, also leads... to what's more important. Fast forward, to whatever age it happens... and now that child is beginning to follow in the footsteps of that parent... without realizing it, their goal is to find out what was important. Possibly choosing friends, that they know are not good for them... and making choices that they know we're not good for them... but all these decisions are being done, subconsciously.
Sometimes that child ends up walking on the exact same path that the parent took, meaning, they use the same vice. Sometimes it's a different vice but it adds up and ends with the same answer.


Now, Here's why the imbalance is fixed and the person changes...and also, how not fixed or, changed

In example 1...after he explained divorce to his own children, he made a conscious realization. That's why the imbalance was able to fix itself. Because the connection was made between the present to the past, giving the answers...righting the imbalance.
Because a 'change' made sense and felt right functionally/emotionally, It allowed that man to change.
Whereas, in the second example, demand did not realize what he was doing or why and so even once his brain had those answers... the connection wasn't made between the present, back to the past. So the imbalance stays and most likely, gets worse.

In the 2nd example:
Sadly, the child doesn't know that's what they're doing. They don't know it's all about answering those questions. So they don't know if and when... a connection is made from the present back to the past...and so they don't know... when to stop.
And most the time the vicious cycle continues, when they have their own children.

So that is it for now... just a general but long piece of information.

enjoincrab
Posts: 1
Joined: Thu Mar 07, 2024 10:16 pm

Re: What if...8

Postby enjoincrab » Thu Mar 07, 2024 10:18 pm

Your post offers a deep and contemplative look at the complexities of human decision-making and the constant interplay between emotional and functional aspects. The examples provided, especially regarding stuck imbalances, add a layer of relatability to the discussion. I'm curious to see how you continue to unravel these concepts and explore their impact in future posts.tunnel rush Well done!

Tealeaves
Posts: 75
Joined: Wed May 05, 2021 3:54 am

Re: What if...8

Postby Tealeaves » Sat Mar 16, 2024 12:23 am

enjoincrab wrote:Your post offers a deep and contemplative look at the complexities of human decision-making and the constant interplay between emotional and functional aspects. The examples provided, especially regarding stuck imbalances, add a layer of relatability to the discussion. I'm curious to see how you continue to unravel these concepts and explore their impact in future posts.tunnel rush Well done!


Lol I must say I'm quite impressed that you read all that...as well as I thank you. I would be more than happy to discuss things further with you. And you're more than welcome to message me, chat with me in the main chat room or, I also have a book on Wattpad. I'll be looking forward to hearing from you one way or another.


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