How Do I Cope?

[inrecovery2011]

I for so long could do everything bit recently the voices have come back. I now feel weak and fragile with no help from family struggling to get the words out of desperation. With thoughts going to who would really care if I just were gone. Then the guilt kicks in cause I am thinking more of my needs than others is there somewhere a middle ground where i can get my needs met too? I have been so irritable and quick to say what I don't mean. I need the help but when I say I need help the words of guilt from my family kick in. Is it wrong for me to express my needs? Will I ever matter to anyone or am I doomed to just struggle through this alone?

[jj]

*hugs* inrecovery. im sorry youre struggling at the moment, but you will find your feet again, in time. keep holding on

jj

[Jalapeno]

Is it possible you could see a professional? If you're experiencing auditory hallucinations they may be able to help with that, and with that out of the way everything else should come easier. It's hard to take care of oneself with something like that in the way.

Sometimes families are supportive... other times not. If yours isn't, then don't turn that inward on yourself - you don't deserve it.

[inrecovery2011]

got a letter from social security yesterday they are withholding part of my check and a big chunk i would of gotten back on my account for an over payment i cant get a break anywhere wondering if i was ever meant to get on my feet or if i am supposed to struggle my whole life trying to hold my head up through it all but getting bogged down with muck being triggered easily lately crying more than ever and trying to get some type of normal type of feeling but every time i think i got it something goes wrong so needing a break so needing to know that there is someone who can take these feelings away the puppy is even getting more annoying it seems the more i do the further backwards i slide i am so tired of feeling that when the mind goes numb its like a blessing cause for a bit i dont have to feel am i normal in this or should i just let everything go i get told to set boundaries by someone but they dont know what it would cost me to do that and then they get mad at me cause i cant do it and let it cost me everything

[dougsan]

You're feeling sorry for yourself will not help you in any possible way. Your SS check was short because you were overpaid by the gov't in some other way. There is no reason to feel sorry for yourself in this. You should have paid attention to income so you'd better understand the coming out go.

You are not where you are suppose to be if you are in pain, depressed, etc. You are ill. This iIllness is not self induced. Depression, as best we can tell, is a result of life experiences our conscience will not let us live with. This is an important reality. What it says is that you can't treat depression. You can possibly treat the reasons for the depression but you have to admit to them first and most of us hide our deep dark experiences. As long as they are kept in the deep darkness you can't treat them. Look into yourself and find the causes of your depression and bring them forth. Write them down. Write a short paragraph on each of them. If you can, get professional help and show yor list to them. If you can't afford this, try vhatting with one of the members of this forum. Many of us are very caring and will do our best to help you with your trials.