Job Fair Gone Wrong

[crystalgaze]

In the last two weeks or so, I was a little down due to an announcement that the head official made recently (where I live). About 3000 government workers will be dismissed.

Some were relieved of their duties on December 30th. There was no real warning. If people had been given enough time, they could have tried to pay up their bills.... I felt it was so unfair & it really is the head official's fault. He made this super stupid bad deal with this business & took NO cut to his OWN check but fired people.

Gosh, if I could give him one kick, I would & ONE would not even BE ENOUGH.

The Christmas season was so depressing with just that alone.

There will be even more competition for jobs now. I had already been having a hard time finding something where I wouldn't be exploited or receive very low wages for my education.

The sad part is that the cost of living is higher, but the salaries are still basically peanuts & can barely sustain you, especially for entry level positions. Essentially, you are underpaid.... & close to poverty if not actually in poverty....

[crystalgaze]

Today, I had a good sized boulder thrown into my lap.

My people, all of a sudden, called me up and the gist of it was, "You need to be doing something." blah blah blah

I was just like, "Muh...." <--- more of a sound effect than a word, combination of a sigh & a facial expression of rolling my eyes & looking up from behind my glasses....


I'm not NOT doing anything by choice. Where we live is limited. When I said, I had felt I would do better by being away YEARS AGO, they uttered something about, "Oh, the economy is bad, & we can't support 2 households." blah blah blah

(Um, they were STILL supporting my brother, whose turn should have been up a long time ago.)

They weren't willing to help me with anything.

--Mind you: They didn't have to pay for my time at the university BECAUSE A SCHOLARSHIP DID. Also, I went to PUBLIC SCHOOL from the 3rd grade!--

Where I've been taking courses hasn't offered anything new right now. Also, I've taken almost everything I can, due to little to no enrollment (little to no demand for courses).

They are making me wish that I didn't exist.

I said I wanted to focus on my health, as I've regained 20lbs ever since I had the seizure 6 months ago (not due to a poor diet, etc.), as well as being on medication again briefly for the random tendonitis in close to my whole right arm.

I struggled for 5 years trying to get better. They virtually left me for dead & I didn't complain once. It was my body, my life--so I tried with what I could. This is now my 6th year with a minor setback in tow (the same seizure 6 months ago)....

It is a pain.

I will keep on keeping on anyway, but what a bummer!

[crystalgaze]

Finally, finally, finally......

I have an idea of what I want to do!


Um.... Well, I don't know if I can actually do or if I will actually like it, but I am so very hopeful that I am daring to dream....

It's hard to do anything when I was lacking direction.... Or rather what I was trying to accomplish was like banging my head against a brick wall (& expecting to see a result).....

I decided I'm not waiting anymore. I've taken most of what I could take at this institute & the courses that I would like to take are not being offered. I have no idea when they will be offered.

My internet has been working fine now for a while, so maybe I will consider online study.

I guess I have my boyfriend to thank for that. He went home to his country & hasn't even called me yet--considering what we both went through recently (the event from my other post).

It's going on a week now. If I can, I'm going to try to go back to school now & not be bothered with him much. If I have time for him, then I have time, but my life doesn't have to be on hold anymore--now that I have a different game plan that I feel is going to work better than the previous one.

[crystalgaze]

I've decided I'm going to try to make a goal for myself & see if I can stick to it.

I'm planning to either start working or be in school by my next birthday. Really, I'm aiming for school. If I'm not actually in school, then my application will be filed, so I would be able to start in the Fall 2013. I'm waiting till that time because I'm trying to get done some of my debt, so I can charge my tuition--in the event I don't receive any help.

If I can't find work at that point, then I will be more active with looking & so forth.

[crystalgaze]

I might get a job. However, I'm not exactly sure. The other thing is that I saw some information regarding training that I may be able to take advantage of at some point.

I have to get more information about it, though..... If I get the job, it would be the first time in a long time that I've had people to encourage me in such a positive manner. I would be doing some sort of electronics repair and well, they have fawned over me because I'm a girl who is kind of good with gadgets--without any formal training. The technician and the owner were very impressed with the capability I've shown thus far.

I'm actually given projects and tasks to do, as I get adjusted to working. I also am apprenticing informally but am glad someone would show me how to do stuff.

[crystalgaze]

I was hired, I guess. It's just that I was bothered by how it all happened.

#1 I feel that no one had any intention of hiring me--not even to just cover gas or appearance (to look halfway decent even). I feel they would've been content to have me volunteer for however long it would be, until main boss returned. I had to let them know that I was leaving to actively seek employment for anything to happen.

#2 How the previous person was let go was problematic & I almost have to be in fear for my life--constantly on guard with people who come to the business because of it.

I DID NO WRONG but am in a position to be killed or suffer great bodily harm, due to how management did things.


#3 I do not have anything in writing, regarding my rate, hours, other specifics of the job, etc.--even though I've requested it. There was also virtually no job training but more perturbing is that there does not seem to be much of any leadership. I've asked for assistance on how to do certain items, but nothing has come of it.

I do not feel comfortable taking charge, especially since it is not my business. (What happens when I do something that they did not want me to do or I don't do it the way they want it?? It's odd, but I am not sure whether they would take my side, if anything were to happen. It frightens me.)


#4 I do not feel successful or safe there per se. Not having the tools to do the job just sucks hard. Everything changes from 1 day to the next that it is just like, "UGH!" Are we accepting anymore projects? blah blah blah (I can't make that call.... ! Remember, I don't own it....) Some people who camp out in the "lobby" just creeps me out & it is happening more & more.

#5 Now that I "work" there. I'm getting requests too late to come in on my off-time. I was willing to do full time but now with the unwarranted stress I have no desire.

#6 The negativity from management is a turn-off. While trying to get in writing the gist of what's expected of me, I was told to my face, "You're not certified." All the time I was there doing work & receiving no kind of compensation for it, my "certification" was never an issue.

My co-worker also gets ragged on & what we do never seems to be enough. Management had the nerve to complain my co-worker to ME, & you know, that just made me UPSET. We never hear "Good job" or any kind of encouragement & it grates my nervous. I'd rather they not SAY ANYTHING AT ALL than to hear negativity.

It's the last thing I need. I had all the dedication in the world & love for the job, until the constant antagonism. The two of us are doing our best to keep the business afloat.

#7 I do not feel my co-worker supports me. We should be huddling together instead of ending up in a divisive mode....

Well, all I can continue to do is try! Anyone has any tips for me?? I'm trying so hard to ditch these training wheels!

[Frame]

Wow Crystal, you've said a lot. You paint a pretty clear picture I think. The reorder in my words:

You're working at small company that's struggling in their market (more the rule than the exception these days). There are many people competing for a job there (I assume that's why people are camping in the lobby).

Who have been volunteering to get your foot in the door and when management let someone go you got the job. But management keeps you in the dark about what you'll be doing from day to day, won't put any of your job responsibilities or terms of employment in writing, and people are angry that you got the paying job.

First of all it seems like you've done everything right to get a paying job. We should are pat you on the back for that. It took great determination in this environment. It's hard to walk into the lion pit every day feeling it shouldn't be this hard and at the same remember it's the right thing.

You have pressure from above, pressure from behind, pressure sitting right beside you, and pressure to do the job which changes from day to day. Have I got this right?

[crystalgaze]

You have pressure from above, pressure from behind, pressure sitting right beside you, and pressure to do the job which changes from day to day. Have I got this right?

That last part was ESPECIALLY correct. It's also a small business.

____________________

~sigh~ I was recently accused of NOT BEING A TEAM PLAYER by my co-worker, IN FRONT of the manager.

My co-worker is stressed out from the job. He was mad for whatever reason. After how he responded to me regarding something harmless I said work-related (passwords for a device), I decided I would go home for the day.

(It was past closing time any way & I took the day off as sick--you know, because I actually wasn't feeling well. I came in to just check on things quickly--since the weekend would be coming.)

Picking up my purse & keys only irritated him further & that's when he started getting on my case AGAIN--picking up where he left off from Wednesday. Leaving, I thought, would be better than having a negative exchange.... I mean, it's a no-brainer. If you see that someone is agitated, wouldn't you get out of the way?? That's like you see trouble coming & walk into it--instead of going around it. For me as a woman, I can't beat a man (right now), capisce?

I tried to just walk away but after he started attacking me, I was like, "No way am I going to take this crap." In the middle of it, I ended up saying that what he was doing made him look like a jack@$$--commenting on a bunch of stuff he didn't seem to know..... The shock on his face was priceless.

The manager came when she heard him start to raise his voice, & then she stood there quietly. As far as I was concerned, her silence seemed to mean she agreed with everything he said. He started shouting first.

They can all kiss the underside of the moon! Again, the issue here is NO LEADERSHIP. Then, I have my co-worker stepping in to PLAY LEADER. HE KNOWS WHAT MANAGEMENT DID, WHICH IS WHY I AM LEAVING. It would have been 2 weeks, but now it is going to be 1 week & I'm done.

I let the manager know that I have hostile working conditions & when I factor in everything else, it is seriously irksome. She's religious, so I let her know that I don't appreciate having to lie through my teeth, regarding people's service requests. That's actually why the 1 person involved the police, although he was wrong for it in the end.

She also doesn't know that her son--the main owner--was trying to make sexual advances toward me. He is also married to boot. I let him know it would not be a good idea, & I was done. That is part of why I had a hard time trying to get paid & that is why I feel I have nothing in writing, regarding my post. (Yes, it's harassment.) My co-worker knows all this because I confided in him about why I had been angry.

Well, it's time to look for another job!

[crystalgaze]

Indeed, I am looking for another job. I left about three weeks ago now. When I quit, I had not been paid. I did not like how it all went down WHY I ended up not getting my check. I had been shouted at earlier in the week by my coworker again & then when the end of the week came, on the exact day, I'm finding out that I won't get paid.

The manager paid her certified technician and left me hanging. I did not feel good about the whole situation & quit.

I had a plan for becoming certified maybe about after 6 or 8 months to a year. I wanted to be sure of the state of the business, as well as complete my apprenticeship, purchase most of the equipment I needed for side work, time to study, & save money to take my certification exams.

The joke is: I did most of the work in the 2 weeks that I wasn't paid. I felt myself becoming situationally depressed, so I left.

Hallelujah!