The start of another difficult day...

Everyday life. How was your day?

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Joined: Sun Feb 24, 2008 2:33 pm

The start of another difficult day...

Postby sljjetmarie » Tue Feb 26, 2008 8:23 am

I am going to do something I rarely do -- try to be brief and to the point.

I am a 38 year old mother of 5 ages 12, 11, 9, 7, 5.

I have had depression since I can remember.

My mother is detatched, type A, competed with me (had her own issues that are understandable given her past)

I am a recovering anorexic and have ADD.

I am raising 5 kids who are all dealing with different learning and emotional difficulties. I am loving them with everything I have and know they truly feel loved.

I am VERY bad at the teaching them how to do the daily life stuff well. I feel it eating me alive on a daily basis. I procrastinate, avoid, get sucked in by being overwhelmed and depressed and can't seem to figure out how to get myself through the daily struggles. Now I am trying to help and guide 5 others through life and teach them how to live. It seems just so wrong somehow. I don't know what I was thinking having kids when I can't seem to manage well myself.

I have lost most to all of my support circle due to friends being moved or transferred. I don't dare just share with anyone. Can anyone relate?

I have worked hard all these years to fight off the desire to just be done with life and end the pain. At this point, I know that I have to make things work for the children I love so much. It's just even more overwhelming when I feel such emmense responsibility for their lives and struggle to find hope in my own. I'd love some feedback if you can give it. Thank you for your time.

Posts: 22
Joined: Wed Jan 09, 2008 11:55 am
Location: Cleveland, Ohio USA

Postby Ryaninatree » Thu Feb 28, 2008 8:19 pm

Sorry I cant say i know how u feel as far as the kids go but I do understand the depression. It seems to me that ur kids are very important to you and as crazy as it may sound God must have given them to you for a reason. Maybe they will have an unconventional upbringing but it seems to me that you will be able to instill values that will help them through there lives. God works in mysterious ways. I look forward to talking to you and we appreciate u telling us your story. Another thing to note is everyone on this site is very supportive. i have found so much support here that I could not find elsewhere. I truly hope you find the same experience here.


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