Depressed partner, need to get stuff off my chest
Posted: Sat Oct 17, 2015 7:00 pm
I don't know whether I need to vent, or whether I need someone to talk to....
All I know is that I need to say how I'm feeling/what's troubling me
I live with my boyfriend of over 2 years who has had depression for over 5 years. When we first got together I was aware of the depression, and his suicide attempts as a teen.
I've made every effort to understand depression the best I can (I know I'll probably never be able to understand fully) but as I have suffered from stress and an eating disorder since I was 6, I know that mental illness isn't just some fad, and you can't just be cured just like that.
Over the past 8 or so months, my partner has been having more and more down days and not it's at the point where he sits at his computer in all his spare hours. He doesn't clean/cook/take care of himself/see his friends. I understand that with depression even the smallest of tasks can seem overwhelming, but I get into trouble if the house is untidy, everything is always my fault and his temper can become volatile.
I no longer take these outbursts personally as I know that it's the depression talking, but sometimes I think I'm being daft for picking up all the pieces all the time. I have a very stressful job and this stress at home is making my ED worse.
I've asked him to get help, which he refuses. He refuses to talk about it.
I try and suggest activities involving light exercise as I know if can be helpful but he doesn't want to know. I even prepare healthy food and snacks to try and keep him away from junk food, but he won't eat them.
I'm a bit at a loose end. Has anyone else been in this situation and can offer advice. He needs to get help, but refuses to. I have no idea how to help him, but I want to so badly.
I'm worried he'll get so bad, that we won't be together anymore, then is he going to spiral even more?
All I know is that I need to say how I'm feeling/what's troubling me
I live with my boyfriend of over 2 years who has had depression for over 5 years. When we first got together I was aware of the depression, and his suicide attempts as a teen.
I've made every effort to understand depression the best I can (I know I'll probably never be able to understand fully) but as I have suffered from stress and an eating disorder since I was 6, I know that mental illness isn't just some fad, and you can't just be cured just like that.
Over the past 8 or so months, my partner has been having more and more down days and not it's at the point where he sits at his computer in all his spare hours. He doesn't clean/cook/take care of himself/see his friends. I understand that with depression even the smallest of tasks can seem overwhelming, but I get into trouble if the house is untidy, everything is always my fault and his temper can become volatile.
I no longer take these outbursts personally as I know that it's the depression talking, but sometimes I think I'm being daft for picking up all the pieces all the time. I have a very stressful job and this stress at home is making my ED worse.
I've asked him to get help, which he refuses. He refuses to talk about it.
I try and suggest activities involving light exercise as I know if can be helpful but he doesn't want to know. I even prepare healthy food and snacks to try and keep him away from junk food, but he won't eat them.
I'm a bit at a loose end. Has anyone else been in this situation and can offer advice. He needs to get help, but refuses to. I have no idea how to help him, but I want to so badly.
I'm worried he'll get so bad, that we won't be together anymore, then is he going to spiral even more?