Personal thoughts / Introductions
Posted: Fri Apr 23, 2021 7:39 pm
I'm here because a while while back I lost my sibling to suicide. And while I want to let it go I cannot. I also don't feel happy with myself either and the person who I want to be is far from the person that I am. My sibling was crying for help and I feel like everyday I'm crying for help like I want to be better but I have wasted so much time. I feel as an adult I'm hopeless and that as a child I was overlooked.
I sometimes want to blame society for not teaching me to be strong to stand up for myself when kids bullied me to not listen to others when they reject or make fun of my hobbies.
I sometimes really want to blame adults for not having been more observant during my childhood. I was quiet, I caused no trouble, listened to the teacher but my academic progress was below average. I was held back a year without any inquiry of me during 3rd grade then I was made fun of by my peers. It was so embarrassing. I'm now 27, I still don't know what to do with my life but I wish I would have been a dancer. I wish I could turn back time stand up for myself and my hobbies. Or I wish I could have persisted more in my college job applications. I wish I had people who cared about me who actually knew how to guide me or empower me.
Right now, I'm not sure what I'm doing but I am trying to be a teacher since mathematics was something that I enjoyed in the past. I'm not sure I actually enjoyed it or if it was the fact that my family and people around me praised me for studying it.
Anyway that is where I am at and those are my thoughts that run in my mind from time to time.
Somebody please create a time machine! Thanks
I sometimes want to blame society for not teaching me to be strong to stand up for myself when kids bullied me to not listen to others when they reject or make fun of my hobbies.
I sometimes really want to blame adults for not having been more observant during my childhood. I was quiet, I caused no trouble, listened to the teacher but my academic progress was below average. I was held back a year without any inquiry of me during 3rd grade then I was made fun of by my peers. It was so embarrassing. I'm now 27, I still don't know what to do with my life but I wish I would have been a dancer. I wish I could turn back time stand up for myself and my hobbies. Or I wish I could have persisted more in my college job applications. I wish I had people who cared about me who actually knew how to guide me or empower me.
Right now, I'm not sure what I'm doing but I am trying to be a teacher since mathematics was something that I enjoyed in the past. I'm not sure I actually enjoyed it or if it was the fact that my family and people around me praised me for studying it.
Anyway that is where I am at and those are my thoughts that run in my mind from time to time.

Somebody please create a time machine! Thanks