Depression Understood Forums

Hi,
My name is nick. Im 31 and from hamburg, germany. I actually dont know why i registered here. Maybe to look for contact or so...
I've been suffering from depressions for nearly half my life, when i think about it. Since my girlfriend left me nearly a year ago, things got really bad. I have no friends and nearly no contact to other people. My job is the only thing keeping me alive. I tried commiting suicide with an overdose of cocaine and heroin. I woke up in the psychiatry. My neighboor found me. Since then all i do is go to work and stay inside at home.
I am really scared most of the time and actually just hate myself. I f***** up my life really bad. I miss my ex girlfriend so much i just want to die every day.

Hi Nick, Someone once said that when we have looked everywhere for answers and have found none, then it is time to look up. In the past when I found myself in desperate situations I called out to God. There was a time, Nick, where I was both obsessed and phobic, at the same time, about a particular situation...I called out to God. Again and again I called out to God. I still do! Why? Because God has delivered me from a life of anxiety, stress, and fear. Nick it is not that I don't have difficulties in life, I do. But I have learned to put my trust and hope in God and His Son Jesus. From this list of articles
http://bit.ly/2hhSJxp
I think you will find #2 hopeful.

Hi, I totally get where you are coming from. Everything in my life has been turned upside down. Half the time I don't know what I'm doing, I also feel like I have no one. An ex totally shattered my confidence, and I sank badly into depression. I still have really bad days and don't leave the house much. Just know everyone has stuff going on. And there's a lot of us who feel like failures and have no direction in life. Your not alone hun.