Hello
Posted: Fri May 26, 2017 11:25 pm
Hi Everyone,
I have been suffering from depression for many of my teen years and all of my adult lifeI am currently taking medication, which helps a lot, but I still struggle everyday.. I have some issues that are causing a lot of difficulty for me and I will like to introduce them here and will address them in the forum later. I don't want this introduction to sound like a sob story but I am afraid that it will.
I have one problem that I feel has led to all the problems that I am currently experiencing and that is that I have little to no self esteem. Well, that isn't exactly correct. I like who I am. I think I am an intelligent and capable person who has a lot to offer the world. At the same time I feel that I am a total failure and more often than not I do not feel that I deserve to be successful.
For six of the last seven years I was in a job that made me miserable and left me as a broken shell of a person who feels defeated and worthless. For the last year and a half that I was working in this job I was applying to other jobs and never even getting a hint of interest from any of the companies I applied for. I had even secure the services of a professional career counselor and still nothing. This forced me to take a job that I am way over qualified for, taking a more that 50% pay cut, just so that my wife and I could have health insurance.
All of this together has made me feel worthless and even more defeated and broken than I did last year when I ended the toxic job I was in.
The other issue is the pay cut and underemployment situation has created a lot of tension and between my less than supportive wife and myself. She is not shy about calling me a looser and rarely misses an opportunity to make me fail like a failure. We have our first kid on the way which I am excited about. I am also quite worried because I am sure that it will ad a lot of stress to an already tense situation.
Finally, I have no friends. This is not hyperbole. Out side of the people that I hold conversations with and work or who I run into while walking my dogs I have no one that I converse with. There is no one that I can meet to have a beer with or hang out with. I have tried to make friends but I don't seem to be very good at it any more. The only person in my life is my wife and more often than not I don't want to talk to her, or can't talk to her because one of us is angry with the other. This has created a serious isolation problem that is not helping my sense of self worth.
If you have read all of this thank you, I appreciate it greatly. I look forward to talking to all of you.
Sincerely,
Hobo
I have been suffering from depression for many of my teen years and all of my adult lifeI am currently taking medication, which helps a lot, but I still struggle everyday.. I have some issues that are causing a lot of difficulty for me and I will like to introduce them here and will address them in the forum later. I don't want this introduction to sound like a sob story but I am afraid that it will.
I have one problem that I feel has led to all the problems that I am currently experiencing and that is that I have little to no self esteem. Well, that isn't exactly correct. I like who I am. I think I am an intelligent and capable person who has a lot to offer the world. At the same time I feel that I am a total failure and more often than not I do not feel that I deserve to be successful.
For six of the last seven years I was in a job that made me miserable and left me as a broken shell of a person who feels defeated and worthless. For the last year and a half that I was working in this job I was applying to other jobs and never even getting a hint of interest from any of the companies I applied for. I had even secure the services of a professional career counselor and still nothing. This forced me to take a job that I am way over qualified for, taking a more that 50% pay cut, just so that my wife and I could have health insurance.
All of this together has made me feel worthless and even more defeated and broken than I did last year when I ended the toxic job I was in.
The other issue is the pay cut and underemployment situation has created a lot of tension and between my less than supportive wife and myself. She is not shy about calling me a looser and rarely misses an opportunity to make me fail like a failure. We have our first kid on the way which I am excited about. I am also quite worried because I am sure that it will ad a lot of stress to an already tense situation.
Finally, I have no friends. This is not hyperbole. Out side of the people that I hold conversations with and work or who I run into while walking my dogs I have no one that I converse with. There is no one that I can meet to have a beer with or hang out with. I have tried to make friends but I don't seem to be very good at it any more. The only person in my life is my wife and more often than not I don't want to talk to her, or can't talk to her because one of us is angry with the other. This has created a serious isolation problem that is not helping my sense of self worth.
If you have read all of this thank you, I appreciate it greatly. I look forward to talking to all of you.
Sincerely,
Hobo