I am a few months off 50 and have moved along way from my home with my partner, hes the lucky one as he has a job and he does not look out of the window for 9 hours a day. Dont get me wrong I wanted to move and have a fresh start and to live in the middle of nowhere sounded like paradise a year a go...... but my mum died and I was too far away to get to say goodbye, then all the bad stuff came back and now I spend time with this smog on me.
I came here to get better but I feel that if I hadn't tried to find a better life I would be ok.....
I cant tell my partner that I am depressed again as he is so happy and thinks he is making my life so much better. I am his happy lover all weekends before he goes to work and welcoming him home at night with smiley face and a cooked meal, but within seconds of him leaving I am down and my thought start to turn back to the awful things from the past. I need help but from where.
Introductions and welcomes.
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