New

[green wall]

Hi ALL, New to message board, not depression. For the last 3 years I rarely go out of the house. I do nothing when I am in. I live in the past where all old mistakes are constantly on my mind. I cant forgive. I am on medication for years. Looking for someone who has gone through this and came out on the other side. Thanks

[TurtleRock]

Hello!

If you feel up to it could you elaborate on your story a bit more ?, What meds your on why ?, IF you are able some of the mistakes you feel you made that you still blame yourself for ?

Anything like that will give people a better picture of who you are, A better chance of finding someone who can more closely relate to your story.

On the subject of shame I stand in front of the bathroom mirror repeat my full name *Which I hate. and imagine I am telling everyone I know the mistake I made and then try and tell myself its ok it happened, it's in the past I can react differently in the future and try to break the negative thought loop. I personally have had some success with coming to terms with the various moments of my life that hurt the most.

Welcome to the Forums

[Ieris]

Hello Green wall..

Sadly we can't go back and change things so why dwell in the past when you can do something now to compensate for those mistakes? You don't need to forgive or forget if you don't want to, those mistakes can act as a reminder of who you once were and help you become a better person.

Don't spend your life looking backwards and miss out on what is ahead of you. You may have wasted 3 years, try not to waste another 3! I wasted 6 and that's 6 chapters of my life which i wont be getting back and it is completely blank. I advise you not to do the same because it really is a waste of time...

I don't know what it was that you did, you may be riddled with guilt and replay what happened again and again but I think you have punished yourself enough already and it's time to let go. The door to that prison is unlocked and you just need to let yourself out of there.. It's ok to make mistakes, that's how we learn isn't it?

Start again when you are ready and do better this time x

[green wall]

Ive been on Prozac for years, tried others without success. I was a child of the seventies with all that entails. I could have been a better mother and much more. I cant sleep. I go to bed thinking and wake up with the same thoughts.

[Alaska1958]

I sometimes wonder if beinga chi ld of the 60's and 70s gave me and my sister the wrong attitude about life. My sister killed herself in 1969 and I've dealt with depression most of my life. Did growing up then leave us believing that we "should" be happy. That we are automatically deserving of happiness? Our mother was born in 1920 and spent her formative years being tempered by a great depression and WWII. She is much more pragmatic about life then I am.

Things have gotten more difficult for me in recent years and I too amhav ing trouble with anger.