new to here

[ria1113]

hey all,

well not really sure whats going on with me so I thought i'd join this site for any help, advice or support.

so in the last couple of weeks I've been feeing really low, I feel like any good moods are forced. I'm so horrible to my fiancé and as each day passes I wonder if he's starting to hate me. I have absolutely no sex drive, he doesn't even ask me anymore so I wonder if he's maybe thinking something is wrong with me. I feel really paranoid about people, i started to think about my friends and family and feel that i am the one who makes all the effort in these relationships and since they don't it feels like maybe they really don't like me. i have bother sleeping as well.

i had a baby 15 weeks ago and we already have a 2 year old. i love them so much and seeing their faces everyday makes me so happy. they are truly wonderful.

i wondered if i maybe had postnatal depression. i'm not so sure though because we've had a really shitty 2 years. everything that we had planned has gone wrong- building a house fell through due to my fiancé's business partner stealing from him- him and his wife were close friends of ours who sat in our company and blatantly lied to us. we had planned to get married next year but that was supposed to happen after we had our house. my fiancé ended up in a costly legal battle with his business partner, while this was ongoing his business partner poisned all the other workers against him so he was going to work each day with people who hated him. i felt so sad for him, he didn't deserve it. when he finally got out of the business due to legal reasons we would never be able to tell the other workers the real story so they will always hate him.once it was over i thought i'd be happy but the hatred is still so raw.

also my grandmother died this year and since it happened the week before i had my baby i feel like theres never been a moment of time to be sad about it. i worry about financial security, just when fiancé was getting back to work he was in an accident he'll be ok thank god.

the reason i don't think its post natal because so much has happened and i think its all just catching up with me and its too much.

sorry this is so long, this is the first time I've put down in words what has all happened. theres so much more but that's the jist.

can anyone help or shed any light? should i go to the dr or wait it out? i wish i could tell my fiancé but i feel embarrassed or maybe a failure? and also the things that happened involve us both and why should i be the only one feeling so low about them??

thanks in advance for any comments. xx

[Coffee7201]

Hi Ria:
I believe I lost the love of my life, because I did not tell him how severely depressed I was. If I can go back there are so many things I would have told him. By not telling him makes things worse.

I want you to know this... you ARE NOT a failure.

The best thing you can do, is tell your partner what you are feeling.

What are going through (Not that I am a therapist nor am I a mother) sounds like post-pardon depression. You can not ignore this.Please go to a doctor, this needs to be addressed.

[markcalvert]

HI Friends,
I am here to share my experience, i am suffering from lots of depression at my workplace due to backlog in my work and i want to recover from it for that i want you some motivational suggestions. Hope i will get them definately.
THANKS.

[karolanne]

Hello,

Postnatal depression doesn't only happen because of a birth. It can be accumulation + birth. I suggest you see your doctor.

Good luck.