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Sheep
Posts: 10
Joined: Fri Aug 23, 2013 4:27 pm

Hi everybody, nice to meet you.

Postby Sheep » Fri Aug 23, 2013 6:14 pm

Thanks everyone for taking the time to read this; it's difficult to explain my situation in a few paragraphs but I'll try. I could really use a place to talk and share ideas with other people who may understand what I'm going through.

I'm an 18 (almost 19) year old female and I believe I've had emotional and mental problems from an early age, around 12 or 13 years old. What I can remember of my early teens is basically my mind being a dull shell, unable to really be inspired by anything or motivated in any way. I felt like I was living in a world of my own and that everything else was outside of me, that I couldn't relate to my friends, and I felt very lost. I've had on and off depression since that time. I've noticed my depression tends to coincide with anorexia, and there have been times when I've gotten a thrill out of starving myself and counting calories.

This past year has been extremely rough for me. I started living on my own and attending college at 17 years old and I've developed a pretty severe anxiety disorder. I was bullied by a past roommate, and that combined with intense courses (I'm a Nursing major) pushed me over the edge. At first I feared I had bi-polar disorder, but instead I began to develop anxiety attacks. I was unable to find help and the anxiety attacks escalated for months until I was getting them around 6 times a day. I was afraid to go back to my dorm and afraid of failing out of school so I would stay in a library until 1 or 2 in the morning and try to study. Without really realizing it, I was going off of practically no sleep and hadn't eaten for over 24 hours. It was also hard for me to breathe (and sometimes even go to the bathroom) because of the tightness in my muscles from the anxiety. One night, I had a nervous breakdown and felt like drowning myself in a bathtub. Another day I found myself vomiting non-stop in a public restroom, sweating and shaking uncontrollably and almost blacked out. And with no one to call, I had to walk myself to the nearest clinic.

After that incident I decided to start seeing a therapist (because my college provided a few sessions for free) but it hardly helped. The sessions were intense, overwhelming, and I felt very uncomfortable. I also tried group therapy which was disastrous. My therapist ended up telling me that I had trust issues, which resulted from an abusive father. Admittedly, I have issues with my father (who was verbally abusive and I often found him looking at pornography of other teen girls while I was their age) but instead of addressing my anxiety the therapist was bringing these older issues to the surface and making the anxiety worse. Angry and frustrated, I quit therapy and finished the rest of the semester at school.

I'm doing a bit better now, but I'm worried about my mental health taking another turn for the worse. I think that talking it out and finding other people to connect with will help immensely.

Thanks everyone for reading.

4EverMe
Posts: 927
Joined: Fri Jun 21, 2013 4:50 am
Location: Washington State

Postby 4EverMe » Sun Aug 25, 2013 3:32 am

Hi Sheep,
I just want to say that I'm immensely sorry for what you're going through! I can relate to you. (panic attacks, feeling separate, lost, and different from others) Do you take medication for this? I do, and it helps calm me down some. I've been on xanax for years. "Chill pills." Lol.

To be honest, I don't know how to help you...though I DO relate. I want to tell you to STOP starving yourself! A lack of vitamins can also contribute to nervous orders. I'm here if you need someone to converse with. I'm 41 and have gone through a heck of a lot in my life. Maybe this means I can be of some help and comfort to you. You're not alone Sheep. Hang in there!! :)
When life throws UA lemon, throw the dang thing back.

User avatar
Lady Lullaby
Posts: 4
Joined: Sun Aug 25, 2013 11:42 am

Postby Lady Lullaby » Sun Aug 25, 2013 12:14 pm

Welcome Sheep!

I second what @4EverMe said. And thanks @4EverMe for sharing, your words were encouraging to me as well. It's nice to find a touch of kindness out there!

Sheep
Posts: 10
Joined: Fri Aug 23, 2013 4:27 pm

Postby Sheep » Sun Aug 25, 2013 4:22 pm

Thank you both very much, and to answer your question, no I don't take any medication for mental health. I don't believe I stayed in therapy long enough for any kind of diagnosis and I can't afford to see a doctor or medication right now. Unfortunately all my money pays for school.

4EverMe
Posts: 927
Joined: Fri Jun 21, 2013 4:50 am
Location: Washington State

Postby 4EverMe » Fri Aug 30, 2013 7:34 pm

Hi Sheep,
Have you checked insurance options? There are also places that go by a sliding scale fee, for people who can't afford to pay! I've had to take advantage of this before, but it sure beats nothing at all...Come to think of it, this is how I first saw a psychiatrist who prescribed xanax and depression meds for me! Please keep posting, so we know how you are. :)

LadyLullaby, thank you for what you said above! Your words were very kind. BTW, where do you get an avatar like that? How would I put one w/my profile via cellphn? If you're not sure, that's okay. :)
When life throws UA lemon, throw the dang thing back.

kittycatlover
Posts: 27
Joined: Sat Aug 31, 2013 11:48 pm
Location: Texas

Hi, Sheep

Postby kittycatlover » Sat Aug 31, 2013 11:55 pm

Hi, Sheep,
I hope you see this.

I have had anxiety all my life. However, there are some great natural remedies you can try that have been very effective for me.

Kava, as a tea or as a liquid suspension, is very effective. When I drink the tea or take the drops, anxiety just falls away. It has been effective for others I have told about this, too.

Another great natural remedy is 5HTP. It creates serotonin in your brain -- which is a neurotransmitter responsible for mood -- and helps you feel happier and relaxed. It can also help with sleep.

I hope you see this and I hope it helps. :)

Sheep
Posts: 10
Joined: Fri Aug 23, 2013 4:27 pm

Postby Sheep » Sun Sep 01, 2013 12:34 am

4Ever, thanks for the advice. I should see what kind of medical options are available to me; it'll help if things take a turn for the worse. I've been trying to find ways to treat myself and improve my condition without meds and it's been helping a bit, but I don't know if it will be good enough a few months from now. Thanks for the advice :)

Kitty, I've never actually heard of 5HTP, and thanks so much for introducing it to me. After a quick search, I've read that it's something you can buy over the counter and it also is supposed to help with a variety of other symptoms like insomnia too. I've also taken up tea drinking, for some reason I've found it really helps relaxing me too. Never heard of Kava, I'll be sure to look for it. I really appreciate your help, our anxiety issues sound pretty similar so thanks a lot for passing your remedies onto me :)

kittycatlover
Posts: 27
Joined: Sat Aug 31, 2013 11:48 pm
Location: Texas

Postby kittycatlover » Sun Sep 01, 2013 9:35 am

Sheep,


Here is the tea that I buy:

http://www.amazon.com/Yogi-Stress-Relie ... ava+stress

I buy 6 boxes at a time and keep it at work and at home.

Also, I use this liquid Kava extract, drops, for pretty quick relief.

http://www.iherb.com/Now-Foods-Kava-Kav ... -60-ml/682

I recently heard of this product, a spray, that has kava you can easily carry with you. I haven't tried it, but it has not only kava but some other herbs for anxiety relief.

https://www.1hourbreak.com/

I hope this helps :)

kittycatlover
Posts: 27
Joined: Sat Aug 31, 2013 11:48 pm
Location: Texas

Postby kittycatlover » Sun Sep 01, 2013 9:44 am

Sheep,

Also there is a technique called Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT).

It is based upon acupressure points, and you simply tap on certain areas of your head, shoulders, chest and face to "reset" your emotions, which using affirmations -- including how you feel now, and how you want to feel, and why you can't let go of your feelings. Dr. Mercola has a video on his website about EFT. I have used this technique and it helps tremendously.

You will have to spend some time figuring out and practicing the technique and also writing out how you feel, and the feelings you have that you want to change.

http://eft.mercola.com/

Hopefully these suggestions help.. :)

4EverMe
Posts: 927
Joined: Fri Jun 21, 2013 4:50 am
Location: Washington State

Postby 4EverMe » Sun Sep 01, 2013 9:21 pm

Hi kittylover,
I've sorta been pondering the use of non-traditional, med alternatives. So, does this kava spray, have a Binaca fresh- breath agent? Heehee! Couldn't resist the humor. :) Just dreamin...hmm. Call it, 'Wintergreen Kava Kremoso Spay.' Hmmm. Kava Minty Breath, for all who wish dentures to be fantastika! Being funny. Bear w/ me (We all need a laugh on depression site). Koala Kava-- if u don't wanna smell like Koala. Hmm. Kraftily Made Koala Koors w/ micro Peppermint Particles. Haha!

BTW, I've a question?.Does the anxiety stuff work for people with SEVERE panic attacks-- like, not wanting to retreat from home Panic Disorder? Or is it most beneficial for milder anxiety??
When life throws UA lemon, throw the dang thing back.

Frame
Moderator
Posts: 1081
Joined: Mon Jun 17, 2013 11:25 am
Location: Pennsylvania

Postby Frame » Sun Sep 01, 2013 9:40 pm

Actually 4Ever let me jump in for a second: because I've only tried EFT a couple times and have had positive results, but I know people who swear by it. And I've read (and been told) that it was developed specifically for the more extreme crisis (eg. returning vets with PTSD). It's a short term fast acting process that can be repeated and worked into other disciplines like meditation, visualization, group therapy,...

So yes on the severity question, IMO. There is info on the web and I found a good audio that goes through it; I think it was...wait...I'll go look it up.

kittycatlover
Posts: 27
Joined: Sat Aug 31, 2013 11:48 pm
Location: Texas

Postby kittycatlover » Mon Sep 02, 2013 9:45 am

Hi, 4Everme,
The kava is good for any level of anxiety, I believe, and so is the EFT.

There is another remedy, as well. Bach Flowers Rescue Remedy -- can be used for babies, animals, and people. I have used it on my dog who is very afraid of thunderstorms.

http://www.bachflower.com/rescue-remedy-information/

Now if I can just lose weight. :( I am the heaviest I have ever been and I hate it. I must try to stay positive and look at my blessings.

kittycatlover
Posts: 27
Joined: Sat Aug 31, 2013 11:48 pm
Location: Texas

Postby kittycatlover » Mon Sep 02, 2013 9:46 am

Oh, and Frame, yes, the EFT has had excellent results for extreme cases like PTSD, returning vets, Panic attacks and so forth. The science is that our emotions have electrical signatures, pathways, and the EFT helps you reroute and regain control.

LonelyShadow
Posts: 8
Joined: Mon Sep 02, 2013 3:08 am
Location: England

Postby LonelyShadow » Wed Sep 04, 2013 6:13 pm

Hi Sheep,

I am so sorry for what you have been through, but I'm so glad you're still here, because I want to help in anyway I possibly can. I can relate to some of the things you've been going through especially the anxiety attacks. It's literally impossible to talk to anyone about depression and anxiety if they haven't suffered from it, because they try to understand but it's not the same. I joined this forum in the hope of meeting people who will be able to help me, as the kind people on here can relate to what I feel even though I am only 18. I hope we will be able to help each other if we can, so if you ever just need someone to talk to, then I'm here to support you along with other members on this forum. You're not alone okay?

P.S. - Sorry for the long message!

LonelyShadow

x

Sheep
Posts: 10
Joined: Fri Aug 23, 2013 4:27 pm

Postby Sheep » Wed Sep 04, 2013 7:20 pm

kitty, thanks a bunch for the info about the tea. I'm planning on ordering some and having it here within about a week. I'll be sure to let you know how it works for me :) I have high hopes!
Also, the EFT sounds pretty interesting, something I can look into later on. I had no idea there were so many options to treating anxiety. Usually I just assume there's some kind of expensive pill, but these other avenues sound much more appealing to me.

Shadow, your support is really wonderful :) Thank you! I would love to chat with you sometime and we could ramble on about our issues, I have a feeling we would connect with some things. All of my problems seemed to crop up when I turned 18 and have lasted about a year (I turn 19 this week haha). I suppose you can say that by now I'm pretty tired of people undermining my health or thinking it's not a problem. Just know that I'm here for you too and if you ever wanted to talk, it's totally ok so send a random PM and ask me whatever :)

Thanks everyone for the response and your support!


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