hi and help please

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nolachef14
Posts: 1
Joined: Tue May 24, 2011 2:49 pm
Location: new orleans

hi and help please

Postby nolachef14 » Tue May 24, 2011 3:06 pm

hello out there....I am finally realizing that I need some help. I just always assumed it was natural to feel this way, but after doing some research and talking with others i know i need some help. If I look back in my life, I feel I have been depressed since adolesence ( I am now 39). I have periods of it not being so unbearable, but it is always there waiting. I have always felt the weight of the world on my shoulders and and it's me against the world. Constant worry and anxiety. I NEVER ask for help as i feel I am the only one responsible for me and I need to be the one to get myself through. I feel tremendous guilt and self loathing for my short comings. I always feel sadness in my soul and envy others around me. All the things I want seem so unattainable and I blame myself for my failure to attain the things I want in life. Over the past 10+ years I self medicated with alcohol to escape the feelings I had...which turned to alcoholism....and that just made the depression WORSE. I quit drinking which was great and I thought "ok it was the alcohol that was the casue of all these feelings I had"....boy was I wrong. I may have quit drinking but the depression is still there. I just recently moved back to new orleans from being gone due to hurricane katrina. I guess feeling healthy I thought I could handle it....boy was I wrong. It seems now like all of it has come crashing down....life, katrina, stress, anger, depression.... I have never been treated for depression becasue i never admitted to myslef that i needed help. I do not have a doctor here, in fact I have not had a regular doctor in years. Where do I start? who do I see to get some help? what do I say to a doc that is brand new to me to get some help? Any info will be greatly appreciated? I am admitting i need help just dont know how to go about getting it!!!

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Warmsoul/Jeanie13
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Postby Warmsoul/Jeanie13 » Tue May 24, 2011 3:12 pm

Hi nolachef14,

Believe you have started. You are realizing how things are and want to be able to control these feelings.

Next step, in my opinion, is to seek medical help, a professional. This can start with you getting a family doctor, talking open and honest with them and let them either help or send you to someone that can.

We do have a depression chat room connect with this forum, maybe consider going into it and chatting with others that feel as you do. Get support, caring chatters.

Keep posting, that helps as well. Do take care of yourself.

Warmsoul
“If we admit our depression openly and freely, those around us get from it an experience of freedom rather than the depression itself.”
--- Dr. Rollo May
Sunshine, smiles and love.

Depression Forums | Depression Chat Rooms | Depression Blogs

http://www.depression-understood.org/

shatteredhopes
Posts: 664
Joined: Tue Oct 27, 2009 1:39 am
Location: U.S.

Postby shatteredhopes » Tue May 24, 2011 7:29 pm

Welcome to the forums! Congratulations on getting sober. As a recovering alcoholic myself, I know we sometimes slip into alcoholism trying to escape the way we feel and self-medicate emotional or mental disorders. Getting sober is a great first step, because in the long run it only makes the underlying issues worse and sometimes adds new problems. So glad you are now ready to get help.

I don't know about what's available in New Orleans, but in most communities there is community mental health or services set up particularly if you are low income or don't have any or sufficient insurance. A doctor can help you get referred, or you can just call and ask about services. They often have dual diagnoses treatment for those who suffer from both substance abuse issues and emotional/mental difficulties.

Be proud of yourself. You recognized the problems and you are into recovery on your drinking now you are ready to begin recovery on the issues that may have propelled you into alcoholism in the first place.
This shows strength and courage, humility in a willingness to ask for and seek help, and strong insight into your self that you know you need more to get better.

Big big hugs. Wishing you light and peace in your day, and welcome to our little family here on the forum and in the chatroom.
"Sorrow floats" John Irving

Obayan
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Joined: Sat Jan 30, 2010 4:51 am
Location: oklahoma
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Postby Obayan » Thu May 26, 2011 2:23 pm

nolachef, listen to warmie and shattered. Two of the smartest people I know and have helped so many here. :)

TackingIntoTheWind
Posts: 1060
Joined: Sat Nov 21, 2009 11:35 am
Location: South Wales

Postby TackingIntoTheWind » Fri May 27, 2011 12:23 pm

Welcome to the site (((( nolachef14 ))))! :)
I would also like to commend to you (((( Warmsoul's )))) and (((( shatteredhopes' )))) suggestions. Along with (((( Obayan )))) they are three of the smartest people I know!
A thought did occur to me as I was reading your post, when you said: " I NEVER ask for help as I feel I am the only one responsible for me and I need to be the one to get myself through. I feel tremendous guilt and self loathing for my short comings ", that rather reminded me of myself. May I suggest to you something that I'm still very much working on realising, learning and putting into practice myself? Asking for help is not a sign of weakness it's a sign of strength. As (((( shatteredhopes )))) said be proud of yourself for what you've already achieved. And, if you do seek help, and I hope that you do, have you considered that just as you will be receiving help yourself, when other people are hearing your story of being into recovery on your drinking and your experiences of depression, this may also help them?
Best of luck!
Captain Adelaide Brooke, holding a weapon on The Doctor: " State your name, rank and intention. "
The Doctor: " The Doctor, doctor, fun. "
Doctor Who: The Waters Of Mars


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