I'm 21 and depressed

[Artemisia1Caria]

Hi
My name is Shiva. I'm a 21 years old woman from Iran.
This is my first time doing anything about my depression. I don't know if it will help, I just needed to talk to someone about this.
I moved to Germany last year and I guess that's the point that things started to get bad. But it all started 5 years ago when my grandmother died.that year I also lost the second round of national biology olympiad which I studied for 2 years for it, and we moved to another city (with a language I didn't even understand) because of my dad's Job and I lost all my friends because of it. That was the point when I started to feel depressed. Unfortunately I ignored it.Short of doing Drugs I did everything I could to distract myself from reality, which further isolated me in my own world and made me feel worse. But back then I at least I had my family to lean on. Now I live in a foreign country with a foreign language and culture, and I'm completely alone.
Before whenever I really needed to I could fight my thoughts and feelings and get trough the Day, I even enjoyed life sometimes. But lately I feel so weak and I haven't done anything productive for a while, which makes me feel worse. I don't know what to do to stop feeling so lost and sad. I just want to be able to enjoy my twenties like other girls my age.

[peaceforall]

hi ,
I'm sorry depression has got you . you did a great job of posting here and asking for help . I have always been depressed since childhood due to my father and his criticism about me , turned to eating and my imagination as a gateway . My loneliness was further fuelled by bullying and people teasing me . I lost myself to my imagination and today after 23 yrs I feel the need for company , I'm lonely and depressed and my masters has been suffering coz of this . I'm 23 now and I feel like there's nothing I can look for ward to . My very short term gf of 1 yr left me coz I was willing to do anything to keep her happy . She was an arab and I was willing to convert myself and live in her country to be with her thus freaking her out and ending my hopes and dreams . I was broken sad and destroyed . I'm trying to get myself together and realized sometimes the small things you do matter, I'm weak as a dead battery emotionally but I'm holding on and trying to make changes to help myself . You live in a foreign country join a language class or something and make new friends . Don't let your failure put you down the only thing you could do is move forward . Look up potential opportunities and try and grab them , do internships with or without pay . Don't be idle even for a moment and importantly don't let anyone know your sad if your depressed fake happiness , happy people will surround you and you'll make up for a great experience . You have freedom more than you could ever dream of in Iran . Go bungee jumping go do something with your life . find meetups , try new food . Most importantly I'm here for you and you could always vent to me guilt free . You have the power in your hand girl you can make amazing things go be awesome and hang in there

[Mrs Syzygy]

Hi,

Depression is a horrible burden to bear, but I am so glad you decided to reach out and post to this forum. That is a great first step.

I am sorry to hear that you feel so isolated - that would be hard for anyone. What is your daily routine like? Is there some small change you could make that might get you headed in a better direction?

Mrs Syzygy
AKA
Mom

[windsong]

Welcome to the forum Shiva.

Glad you reached out here and sorry you are going through such a tough time. And I believe peaceforall and Mrs Syzygy gave good advice so not sure what I can add to that.

[Artemisia1Caria]

Hi guys
Thanks for the support and great advices. The problem now is I have a very important exam next month, which for I feel totally unprepared.Therefore now anxiety is added to the mix and because I'm suppose to be studying all day, there isn't much I can do about the isolation.But I'm thinking about signing up for a dance class which I think will help both my anxiety and depression.Lately I feel like I'm stuck and can't move. Days go by without me doing anything productive. I'd really appreciate any advice on how to get moving again.

[defeated]

Hi guys
Thanks for the support and great advices. The problem now is I have a very important exam next month, which for I feel totally unprepared.Therefore now anxiety is added to the mix and because I'm suppose to be studying all day, there isn't much I can do about the isolation.But I'm thinking about signing up for a dance class which I think will help both my anxiety and depression.Lately I feel like I'm stuck and can't move. Days go by without me doing anything productive. I'd really appreciate any advice on how to get moving again.

Hey Artemisia, Welcome to the forums

I completely understand what its like feeling overwhelmed when you have a big task such as studying. I wanted to share something that sometimes works for me. Its called the pomodoro technique. The way it works is, you set a timer for 25 mins and commit to whatever task you are working on, studying in your case. Then I usually take like a 10min break to do whatever. (Some find that actually getting up and moving around during your break helps) Then I set the timer for another 25mins. I find that this helps me break up a big task into smaller pieces therefore not so overwhelming. Here is the site to this technique just in case you wanted to check it out. http://pomodorotechnique.com/ I hope this helps! Good luck on your exams.

<3.