Thanks (((( Warmie ))))!
I've had a rather up-and-down week, so positive feedback is very much appreciated!
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Actually, it's interesting that you should say that. I think that I'd like to be a writer. I do have a fairly...er..." active " imagination, and I've always loved stories. I've written a few small odds-and-ends for the newsletters of a few science-fiction fan-clubs that I've been a member of over the years. And, I did once have a couple of paragraphs published in SFX, a science-fiction magazine published in the UK. ( A friend of mine attended a Star Trek convention in South Wales in 1996, and the editor of SFX asked him to write a few paragraphs on what he thought of the convention, to go in the magazine. However, my friend had been somewhat involved in the running of the convention, and therefore he didn't feel that he could give a totally unbiased opinion of it. So, my friend, knowing that I'd attended the same convention, asked me to jot down a few impressions of it. Which I did. ) I didn't get paid for it, so I can't truthfully claim it as a " professional ", sale but it was SOOOO COOOOOOOOOOOL to see my words and name in print!
( I am SUCH a GEEK!!!! But, I know this, and accept myself as I am. So, I can at least claim points for honesty, self knowledge and self-acceptance...right?
I am feeling quite trapped and isolated at the moment, by things like work not going so well, and a very other things, which is very much triggering my depression at the moment. In fact there are times when I do think quite often about suicide. If only as the proverbial " way out of the woods. " Although, I still hope that, by the Grace of God, I'll still be able to find the resourcefulness and resilience to " muddle through " to better times...
I've also been feeling slightly " aimless " at the moment. It's actually quite ironic how lost, disconnected and lonely I feel sometimes. I'm only a few miles from the hospital where I was born, the home I grew up in, the schools I went to, my past and present places of work. But, there are times when I wonder, if I went to Canada, New Zealand, Australia or the US, would, could I feel that much more on the outside-looking-in? At least in a foreign country you might expect to feel that way.
So, I am going to take your suggestion to heart (((( Warmie )))). And, at least start jotting down story ideas again. It'll give me something to focus on and distract myself with at least.
( In fact I have this idea for a character...A very wise, kind woman who talks to people only through the internet, in a ceaseless bid to make the world a better, kinder place..." The Adventures of Warmhearts Corner. "
( Assuming you don't sue my for copyright violation!
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but when it does me I try to remember I will get though the worst of it if I just hang on and do my best to fight the suicidal ideation. One trick I have learned, when I feel suicidal I don't allow myself to entertain thoughts of how and details, I just postpone. I will do it next week, or next month, or something like that and just focus on the here and now and getting through the moment. Inevitably, the cloud lifts some and so I never get around to doing the awful deed.