All Saints' Day, or All Hallow's Eve, began as an ancient Celtic and later a Roman harvest festival. When the Irish immigrated to the United States in the1800's, they brought with them a Halloween tradition of lighting candles in turnips to keep spirits at bay. Finding turnips in short supply in America, however, they began carving pumpkins and thus the Jack-O-Lantern was born.
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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
Because he didn't have any guts.
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What kind of music do mummies listen to?
Wrap!
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What kind of monster is safe to put in the washing machine?
A wash-and-wear wolf.
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What's the first thing ghosts do when they get into a car?
They boo-kle their seatbelts.
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What has webbed feet, feathers, fangs and goes quack-quack?
Count Duckula.
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What do you call someone who puts poison in another's corn flakes?
A cereal killer.
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Why are monsters huge and hairy and ugly?
Because if they were small and round and smooth, they'd be M&M's.
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Why wasn't there any food left after the monster party?
Because everyone was a goblin!
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How did the ghost patch his sheet?
With a pumpkin patch.
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What do witches use on their hair?
Scare spray.
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What is as sharp as a vampire's fang?
His other fang.
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What do the birds sing on Halloween?
Twick or Tweet.
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What did the little ghost have in his rock collection?
Tombstones.
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Why should a skeleton drink ten glasses of milk a day?
It's good for the bones.
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What do baby ghosts wear on Halloween?
Pillowcases.
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What do you get when you drop a pumpkin?
Squash.
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Why did the witches' team lose the baseball game?
Their bats flew away.
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What was the witch's favorite subject in school?
Spelling.
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What does a vampire fear most?
Tooth decay.
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Where did the vampire open his savings account?
At a blood bank.
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Where do mummies go for a swim?
To the Dead Sea.
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What is Transylvania?
Dracula's terror-tory.
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Where does Dracula water ski?
On Lake Erie.
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What do you get when you divide the diameter of a jack-o-lantern by its circumference?
Pumpkin pi.
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Why are there fences around cemeteries?
Because people are dying to get in.
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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
He didn't have the guts.
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What does a ghost eat for lunch?
A boo-loney sandwich.
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How does the silly witch know what time it is?
She looks at her witch-watch.
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What did the mommy ghost say to the baby ghost?
Don't spook until your spooken to.
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What kind of protozoa likes Halloween?
An amoeboo!
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How do vampires get around on Halloween night?
By blood vessels.
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Why do ghouls and demons hang out together?
Because demons are a ghoul's best friend!
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What happened to the guy who couldn't keep up payments to his exorcist?
He was repossessed.
Warmie
