Depression Understood Forums

when i was about 9yrs old my grandad did things to me he shouldn't! AND HOW f****** DARE HE!
this is the 1st time i have let it out and it feels good! my realationships have been shit thro out my life, i am clinging with men and stay with them even tho they hurt me. i can not leave instead they leave me and the whole thing starts again with another man. they hurt me but i stay, they leave me, also every man i'm with i always think they are going behind my back, and drive them crazy with this, even tho deep down i know there not i just can't help looking for it. I want to be normal but idon't know what this feels like as i was to young to know how a person should feel.... if u know what i mean? aaaagggggrrrrrhhhhhhhh to it all really!
sorry but i just needed to say this! life is so f***** up the brain a mad and wonderful thing but not to wonderfull otherwise i wouldn't be here lol. i'm mad aren't i

no you're not mad, you are just suffering and it's not surprising,how f***ing dare he indeed,you were his family,how dare he do that to an innocent 9yr old girl,well done for speaking out,sorry i only just noticed this after i wrote all the other stuff,sounds like it is def more than just post natal stuff. no wonder you have issues with depression and relationships. i really hope you can find a therapist or support group to talk thru all this so that the b*****d doesnt comntinue to ruin your life,well done again for telling us it must have been awful carrying this around for so long

good luck with everything

lisa xx

listen this happened to my eldest daughter when she was 12 .shes 29 now
and do you know who it was ,the school headmaster ,now im a man ,and i think am a very nice human being .but i know first hand men are absolute pillocks at times .im an enginneer by trade and some of the men ive worked with ,we,ll they were animals , let it out if it make you feel better ,,,,,,xn728