I need an outlet

Shared experiences of life, and the path that has led you to where you are.

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Aloha808
Posts: 1
Joined: Thu Feb 02, 2023 2:35 am

I need an outlet

Postby Aloha808 » Thu Feb 02, 2023 2:58 am

Aloha - I'm new here and I'm glad I came across this Forum. I didn't know anywhere else to turn. I'm a 50 year old woman and I live in beautiful Hawai'i. However, I just lost the love of my life to Hodgkin's Lymphoma 7 months ago . He was diagnosed in October of 2021 and was told he had 2 - 2.5 years to live. Unfortunately, he died 9 months later on my birthday. It's extremely difficult for me to get out of bed every morning. I lay in bed and look at his/our pictures, watch videos and smell his clothes. My mom and sister come to my apt. to make sure that I have something to eat, that I change my clothes, brush my teeth & hair, and clean my house. My crying is non stop an I pretty much lost my will to live. Some days the pain is so unbearable I just wannah disappear

Maria Elizabeth
Posts: 5
Joined: Thu Feb 02, 2023 3:01 pm

Re: I need an outlet

Postby Maria Elizabeth » Thu Feb 02, 2023 3:11 pm

Aloha, aloha808
I am really sorry for your loss. The love of my life has polycythemia vera, a rare blood cancer on top of a tumor on his brian stem. I dread the day you are now facing.. I know it's coming but I can't imagine it actually coming to be. I think I might be the type to die of broken heart syndrome, like my aunt.
Your outlet has been noted. Here if you need to let out some more.. Sometimes that is all we can do and all we need or want.

MagisterLudi
Posts: 5
Joined: Sat Feb 18, 2023 10:10 am

Re: I need an outlet

Postby MagisterLudi » Sat Feb 18, 2023 4:28 pm

I'm so sorry you had to go through this. I, too, am fifty. My wife of fifteen years just left me. I am not trying to imply that my story compares with yours, but what I can say is that I am feeling exactly the things you are feeling. I am having trouble hanging on. I have an eight year old daughter; without her, I very well may not have been typing this right now. I have to stay here for her. I am not trying to be inspirational; on the contrary, I have no hope or life left in me. But at the very least, know that you are not alone in your suffering.

hueljannie

Re: I need an outlet

Postby hueljannie » Wed Dec 13, 2023 10:33 pm

It breaks my heart that you had to go through this. The year is fifty-one. I was left by my wife after fifteen years. I don't mean to imply that our experiences are comparable, but I can relate to how you're feeling. Struggling to maintain my balance. The fact that I am writing this is probably due to my eight-year-old daughter. It is imperative that I remain her companion. I refuse to be inspired; I have no hope. A lot of people are going through the same thing that you are. geometry dash


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