a probably pathetic rant

Shared experiences of life, and the path that has led you to where you are.

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TakeMyArmesAndLegs
Posts: 1
Joined: Sat Mar 21, 2020 4:58 pm

a probably pathetic rant

Postby TakeMyArmesAndLegs » Mon Mar 23, 2020 1:16 am

Hi everyone. i don't know if i'm doing this right because this is my first time posting on here.
I have never been the child my parents liked. honestly at first i didn't mind. well that was before school started anyways. i'm not going to lie. i was a tad bit overweight. the other kids made fun of me for it though at first to me that was normal treatment. i was used to being pushed around by people. that's when my mom and my brothers dad got divorced. this took a toll on my mental heath. what can i say i was six and didn't understand. i thought they where happy. i was still being bullied at school. i remember it like it was yesterday. This one girl would get brownies and cupcakes and ask me if i wanted them. i was probably the stupidest child on the planet because i would always say yes. from there she would throw it across the cafeteria and say things like "go doggy! fetch the treat!" and i hate to say it but i did. every. single. time. once i was told that wasn't normal i guess i stopped caring for my body. my new stepdad didn't help that either. he made me feel like trash every day and for a few years i was just sad. that's when i learned about self harm. age 10 and i had already screwed up my arm pretty bad. the first time i was caught was two years ago in december. it was my stepdad who caught me and he just made me feel worse. soon to find out i have depression and bipolar disorder. this didn't make anything better and now i'm locked in my room for days on ends.

sorry. i just needed to get that off my chest. thanks....

mousemeowkin
Posts: 11
Joined: Fri Mar 20, 2020 12:27 pm

Re: a probably pathetic rant

Postby mousemeowkin » Tue Mar 24, 2020 2:51 am

I'm sorry you've had such painful experiences.

Although the events have passed, it sometimes seems like the memories will stay for ever and dealing with those memories can be even more painful than dealing with the actual events themselves. Memories are often seasoned with self-hate and self-blame which can get stronger over time.

I hope you're all right.

Prycejosh1987
Posts: 424
Joined: Sun May 31, 2020 10:54 am
Location: Birmingham UK

Re: a probably pathetic rant

Postby Prycejosh1987 » Wed Jun 03, 2020 12:48 pm

TakeMyArmesAndLegs wrote:Hi everyone. i don't know if i'm doing this right because this is my first time posting on here.
I have never been the child my parents liked. honestly at first i didn't mind. well that was before school started anyways. i'm not going to lie. i was a tad bit overweight. the other kids made fun of me for it though at first to me that was normal treatment. i was used to being pushed around by people. that's when my mom and my brothers dad got divorced. this took a toll on my mental heath. what can i say i was six and didn't understand. i thought they where happy. i was still being bullied at school. i remember it like it was yesterday. This one girl would get brownies and cupcakes and ask me if i wanted them. i was probably the stupidest child on the planet because i would always say yes. from there she would throw it across the cafeteria and say things like "go doggy! fetch the treat!" and i hate to say it but i did. every. single. time. once i was told that wasn't normal i guess i stopped caring for my body. my new stepdad didn't help that either. he made me feel like trash every day and for a few years i was just sad. that's when i learned about self harm. age 10 and i had already screwed up my arm pretty bad. the first time i was caught was two years ago in december. it was my stepdad who caught me and he just made me feel worse. soon to find out i have depression and bipolar disorder. this didn't make anything better and now i'm locked in my room for days on ends.

sorry. i just needed to get that off my chest. thanks....

Do not let your bad times get to you. I was also bullied at school, but i dont remember those days now. What you need to do is have more confidence in yourself. There are alot of rude people in this world. I urge you to take peoples attitude towards you at face value. I know that that is very hard but it can be done. Keep people who treat you like a human being around you. Look after your figure and eat right. All the best.


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