Lonely old man.

Shared experiences of life, and the path that has led you to where you are.

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Joined: Sat Jul 27, 2019 1:20 am

Lonely old man.

Postby Upoldtimer » Sat Jul 27, 2019 2:05 am

Well, yes I'm new matter of fact my first time talking about my feelings to anyone. So I'm 64 well educated, also very experienced in the trades. So with this said I like to work, always liked to fix things rather than buy new. I'm married and my wife doesn't see things the same way I do and never did. I knew long before she moved in that she wasn't for me and I tried to discourage her from moving in with me. Well in 1997 she just showed up one day with her car and a few things and decided to move in with me. I didn't have the heart to send her away. She had just got out of a very bad marriage and needed support which she found in me I found. So 22 years later and two daughters later I'm still unhappy and the last 12 years I've been I'll to the point of being unable to have a real job. I could work from home if I had a shop but money prevented one from being built. I've had what I thought were good ideas to work from home but have always been shot down by my now wife. The girls wanted us to get married so I agreed to keep peace. So in 2006 we got married by the justice of the peace. My health continued to decline so I put the house in my wife's name and everything else in a trust for our daughters. So I now have a little reprieve in my health so I thought we might move to a house with a shop and a garage for her car since we live in the great white north to make winter easier for her. And the shop would allow me to make a few extra bucks to help with bills or just to be able to take the family out to eat once in awhile. Well my wife is so negative on everything and says the things I had before we got together are junk that she will have to get rid of when I die. Well most of my things are worth money and she says make a list of what everything is worth so I know what to sell it for. Well maybe it's me but I don't feel like spending the time I have left making a list for her. After all she and the girls will benefit from the money they get So i figure with Google, Ebay and other ways they car find the value themselves when the time comes. And the property I found which initially she was in favor of got shot down if I was to bring any of my belongings there so that is now a dead issue. So I'm trapped to sitting in the house watching tv until I die is the way the future looks for me. I thought I've been a good husband, and father. I never drank, smoked or done drugs or even smoked dope in my life. We are helping our oldest daughter through 8 years of college for optomitry school and the other daughter has Downs Syndrome but does very well you can't tell by what she can do. So what do I do, it seems there's nothing left for me in this life. I think they will all get along fine without me. Anyone know what to do with a old man most gave up on?

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Joined: Tue Aug 07, 2018 8:28 am

Re: Lonely old man.

Postby kevinloveslena » Sat Aug 03, 2019 1:17 pm


I am so sorry that you are going through such a tough time right now. Feeling like everyone has given up on you is the worst feeling that one can feel, or at least it's the worst feeling I have ever felt. Please know that you have so much more to live for in the future, please never give up! I have found that, though everyone is made with different strengths, some are outstanding at figuring out complicated problems or working with groups of people. Your strengths include fixing things. My Dad was the same way!
What changed my life more than anything is accepting Christ into my life. I know some people may not think that is a big deal, neither did I at one time, but it has been the most fundamental change in my life that has helped with my depression and accepting myself for who I am. It also introduced me to the Bible, which has unlocked so much more for me about life as well as providing me with "help in time of trouble".
For instance, one of my favorite verses is:
"He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.
I will say of the Lord, 'You are my refuge and my fortress, my God in whom I trust.'" Psalm 91:1-2
I will be praying for you, God bless you!

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