Severely depressed and want to "check out". Please
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Severely depressed and want to "check out". Please
Currently 20 yrs old, junior in college. My last semester of sophomore year I fell into a depression. I fell into it cuz my girlfriend for 3 years broke up with me and had sex with my friend. Went from 250 lbs-312 lbs in 4 months. Slept all day, ate tons, abused marajuana and alcohol, never came out of my room and failed all my classes cuz i never went which made me more depressed. Also Im not attractive, overweight, and hate school and hate my major (safety engineering). Over summer I got medicine and help (I have a therapist) and became happy again. Then I barely got back into school and am on academic probation this semester. I have not been to 1 of my classes yet this semester (its been one month since school started) and have 2 1/2 months left of school. Im depressed again. Also I think its too late to get a good enough GPA to stay in school and don't know what to do with my life. Ive lost 30 lbs of the weight I put on and still no girls ever notice or talk to me. If I don't start going to class I'll end up flunking out and living at home and thinking about it makes me even more depressed. If I flunk out my parents will hate me and waisted thousands of dollars on me for nothing. I don't know what I want to do with my life and what my life's purpose is. I can't take this anymore. I want to check out. I want to never wake up when I'm asleep. What do i do? please help.
Hi Ryan,
You have taken some positive steps already. You have a therapist, and you have posted here. That shows that you can talk about your problems. I think this is the key for you...
Please talk to your parents. They will find out what is happening eventually, and the sooner you talk to them, the sooner they can begin supporting you emotionally.
You said you had a girlfriend for 3 years? Wow that is impressive, it shows you can love someone and stay committed to them for a long time, it is a wonderful part of you and it can give you hope for the future. For now, while your confidence is low, don't be so concerned about girls, put focus into where you want to go next. When you are improving and being confident is when the girls will notice you.
Where to go next? Of course, this is a tough question! Keep in mind that a lot of people change majors during college, have a nose around at what is on offer, and see what it will cost to change. What about your current major? There might have been something about it that interested you initially, perhaps you can rekindle that interest? Did you lose interest because of the breakup?
You and your parents may decide that flunking out of college, or deferring for a year, may actually be beneficial. It wouldn't be the end of everything. But whichever path you take, try to find a destination that you want to get to. Something that when you are down, you can remind yourself "I want this".
Good luck!
You have taken some positive steps already. You have a therapist, and you have posted here. That shows that you can talk about your problems. I think this is the key for you...
Please talk to your parents. They will find out what is happening eventually, and the sooner you talk to them, the sooner they can begin supporting you emotionally.
You said you had a girlfriend for 3 years? Wow that is impressive, it shows you can love someone and stay committed to them for a long time, it is a wonderful part of you and it can give you hope for the future. For now, while your confidence is low, don't be so concerned about girls, put focus into where you want to go next. When you are improving and being confident is when the girls will notice you.
Where to go next? Of course, this is a tough question! Keep in mind that a lot of people change majors during college, have a nose around at what is on offer, and see what it will cost to change. What about your current major? There might have been something about it that interested you initially, perhaps you can rekindle that interest? Did you lose interest because of the breakup?
You and your parents may decide that flunking out of college, or deferring for a year, may actually be beneficial. It wouldn't be the end of everything. But whichever path you take, try to find a destination that you want to get to. Something that when you are down, you can remind yourself "I want this".
Good luck!
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