New here. would like some advice....

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~CC~
Posts: 1
Joined: Mon Apr 22, 2013 12:51 am

New here. would like some advice....

Postby ~CC~ » Mon Apr 22, 2013 1:41 am

The past month i've been going through a lot of changes. I recently moved halfway across the country with my boyfriend of three years and last month lost my job. Decided not to get another job because we were making enough without it and am moving back to my home town in two months. Well that's not really going my way. My boyfriend is a musician and he's going to be staying and i'll be moving back by myself....we've been talking about splitting up recently because we've been getting in a lot of fights. I honestly thought this guy could have been the one, but we're way too different. I guess i'm having a hard time trying to accept that..

I've also been getting the most intense headaches these past few weeks....probably brought on by stress. I've also been having these breakdowns and can't stop....I don't think these problems are big enough to be feeling this way....

dougsan
Posts: 104
Joined: Thu Apr 11, 2013 1:59 pm
Location: Massachusetts

Re: New here. would like some advice....

Postby dougsan » Wed Apr 24, 2013 10:43 am

~CC~ wrote:The past month i've been going through a lot of changes. I recently moved halfway across the country with my boyfriend of three years and last month lost my job. Decided not to get another job because we were making enough without it and am moving back to my home town in two months. Well that's not really going my way. My boyfriend is a musician and he's going to be staying and i'll be moving back by myself....we've been talking about splitting up recently because we've been getting in a lot of fights. I honestly thought this guy could have been the one, but we're way too different. I guess i'm having a hard time trying to accept that..

I've also been getting the most intense headaches these past few weeks....probably brought on by stress. I've also been having these breakdowns and can't stop....I don't think these problems are big enough to be feeling this way....


Get yourself a job and gain back your independence, first. Just "hanging around" all day would awaken my depresson by making me feel I'm lazy which, in turn, makes me think less of myself. Your boyfriend might say he doesn't care if you work but I doubt he means it.

What are you fighting about? Don't say "many things" or "everything", there probably is a common problem or concern beneath the surface of the fights.

These differences you mention should have come up before you moved unless you weren't living together before the move. And, the move itself would put a heavy strain on any relationship. You find yourself in a new environment with no true friends (your true friends were left behind and now you're working to make new friends, I would guess). Look at how your life changed by moving. Don't over react becasue your confused and a bit unbalanced emotionaly. You're suppose to feel this way. Talk about these feelings with your BF. And try to understand your headaches and the stress you'r feeling in all likely hood are caused by your discomfort with the move, being out of work, lacking physical contact with your friends, etc.

You can move home but I bet dollars to donut holes it will not help as much as you think it will. What happens to your love for your BF of more than 3 years? The leaving will hurt for a long time. If leaving is a mistake, it will hurt almost forever.

Much luck with your decisons.

Clear skies and rainbows.


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