The Cliche Of Not Being Good Enough pt 2
Posted: Fri Mar 22, 2013 7:58 pm
In 2nd grade my school shut down because it was in a terrible neighborhood.
I didn't think it was terrible.
Besides the fact that I was the only girl in my class and I once found a heroin needle on the play ground.
So I needed to go to a different school.
And where does my mom chose for me and my cousins to go to?
The most elite Catholic-Private school in town.
Where I was the only "fat" girl.
Where for my entire stay there I was looked down on and pitied on because I lived in "the ghetto".
I tried to fit in but it never really did work.
Most of my friends at that school were guys.
Because even at snooty private schools like those guys are always still less judgmental than the girls.
I remember specifically the day of my 11th birthday.
My principal knew I wrote and asked me to write a cheer for the teachers to do at the pep rally they had that day.
I was so excited. I told everyone who offered to listen.
I was sitting in the bleachers and the teachers come out and start singing their cheer.
But it wasn't what I wrote. They were singing another song.
They didn't even tell me before hand.
From then on people didn't trust me.
From then on I began to not trust myself.
I didn't think it was terrible.
Besides the fact that I was the only girl in my class and I once found a heroin needle on the play ground.
So I needed to go to a different school.
And where does my mom chose for me and my cousins to go to?
The most elite Catholic-Private school in town.
Where I was the only "fat" girl.
Where for my entire stay there I was looked down on and pitied on because I lived in "the ghetto".
I tried to fit in but it never really did work.
Most of my friends at that school were guys.
Because even at snooty private schools like those guys are always still less judgmental than the girls.
I remember specifically the day of my 11th birthday.
My principal knew I wrote and asked me to write a cheer for the teachers to do at the pep rally they had that day.
I was so excited. I told everyone who offered to listen.
I was sitting in the bleachers and the teachers come out and start singing their cheer.
But it wasn't what I wrote. They were singing another song.
They didn't even tell me before hand.
From then on people didn't trust me.
From then on I began to not trust myself.