Depression Understood Forums

Mental illness runs on both sides of my family. My dad is a functioning alcoholic who never abused me and my mom is a drug addict who emotionally abused me. She has borderline personality disorder and she generously passed it on to me. I have been clinically diagnosed with Bipolar Type II, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Borderline Personality Disorder and after my last stint in a mental hospital, Major Depressive Disorder.

Basically, I'm REAL FRIGGIN SAD. I've gone through bouts of drug abuse and self harm as well as suicide attempts (which is what landed me in the mental hospital last week.)

What makes it difficult for me is that even though I've had some bad things happen in my past, I've moved on from them, so therapy is no longer of any use to me. I don't have any real horrific trauma in my past, just some not so pleasant things that I had a harder time coping with because I couldn't see through my haze of mental illness.

So here I am dragging along from psychiatrist appointment to appointment trying to find a mix of medication that will get my brain chemistry to a normal place.

I'm also battling a symptom called "depersonalization" which has not let up AT ALL since I was 13. I don't even know what life feels like without it anymore.

So, without going into my whole life story that's my story.

Hi (((suredoloveyou))) Thank you for sharing some of your difficult story. I admire your courage and strength. I hope the right combination of medications will help you feel and cope better. I would not dismiss the notion of continued therapy, however, sounds like having a person listen and offer support on a continued basis is a good thing. Please keep posting and if you have not checked out our chat room at DU, you might consider giving chat a try. Take care and we look forward to hearing more soon.