Need someone to talk to

[rebecca42]

I've been going through alot of things in my life. I hate to make a long story so I'll try & keep it short. My husband has a short temper & goes off on the smallest things. I try so hard to please him but everyday there is something I've done wrong. I've tried talking to him but somehow he always turns it around to be my fault. It's like he's brainwashing me. I really don't understand his thought process but it's driving me crazy. Anyone want to talk?

[Obayan]

It sounds like you really need to talk to a counselor quick. These are classic manipulation and abuse tactics.

[rebecca42]

I thank you for replying to my forum. No we haven't gone to a counselor & yes I try many, many times to talk to him but it always comes out to be my fault or something I could of done better. I really don't know what to do. I do love my husband. This is unfortunelately my 2nd marriage and I hate to see it fail. I know it takes two & sometimes it seems like he is trying & other times he blows up like dynamite. I always wanted the fairy tale marriage. Marry one person & spend the rest of your life with that person. Well, I had a hard time with my first divorce because I didn't want to be a divorcee. Now husband #2 comes along & blows me off my feet. I thought we were soulmates until I found out he cheated. He doesn't feel like he cheated. He feels like he was obligated to take care of this woman's needs. Sometimes he makes me feel so good but alot of the time he makes me feel bad about myself & our marriage. I don't want to be a failure again. Sorry so long & again thanks for the replies.

[Obayan]

I had a husband like that once. Always ended up makeing me feel guilty for feeling bad when he hurt me. Spent my time makeing him feel better. Always makeing excuses that would allow myself to keep in the marriage even though I knew it was wrong. Took me 9 years to stop. By then, it had accelerated to a degree you wouldn't believe. The mental games got too boreing for him after a few years and it went to physical. By then, I was so into the habit of forgiving and accepting, that I forgot how to fight back. It took a long time for me to stand up to him, but once I did, I swore no man would ever manipulate, abuse or hurt me ever again. Met a wonderful man after that who treated me very good. He and I were together 22 years before he passed away. I am very glad I came to my senses when I did with the ex. If I hadn't, I would have lost out on 22 years of love and respect and kindness.

[hurtfull]

I had a husband like that once. Always ended up makeing me feel guilty for feeling bad when he hurt me. Spent my time makeing him feel better. Always makeing excuses that would allow myself to keep in the marriage even though I knew it was wrong. Took me 9 years to stop. By then, it had accelerated to a degree you wouldn't believe. The mental games got too boreing for him after a few years and it went to physical. By then, I was so into the habit of forgiving and accepting, that I forgot how to fight back. It took a long time for me to stand up to him, but once I did, I swore no man would ever manipulate, abuse or hurt me ever again. Met a wonderful man after that who treated me very good. He and I were together 22 years before he passed away. I am very glad I came to my senses when I did with the ex. If I hadn't, I would have lost out on 22 years of love and respect and kindness.

Been there let him go before it gets worst and it can.I to lost my true love on my son,s bd so I believe they r togrteir.want to talk look hurtfull

[hurtfull]

u can email any time u want.From all the lives I been through No one should have .but I know I was put here for a reason.sometimes just having someone to hear is all it takes that for all

[fern]

I like your story so much, something familiar with mine. You know I feel alone. Nobody talk with me, no friend and I only can tell my story to my teddy bear. He was very good to me, first I thought he help me arrange my life and my future because he love me. But, it getting worse and worse. Control all my life, i have no chance to meet my friend, control my career. I still remember, he join MLM and Ins. company then he ask me to cal my friend out and ask them to join/buy things from him. and this treat to my family too. I feel so bad for doing this to my friend and my relative. Then he ask me to stop my job and help him to build his career with didnt last long. I feel that my life go into a wrong way, I dont want this life.
On my marriage, i dont have chance to choose too. He tell everyone we will marriage, I cant say No too. Until last 2 month. I stand up and I move back to my mom house. I cant crying every night and i suicide for 2 times already, I scare will have the 3rd time so I ran away from him.
He still say that I am sick and ask me to go and see counselling. I already make an appointment and I will go this Thursdays. Hopefully I can find back my life.
He still dont want to let me go, I feel scare and very hard to breath when I see him. I am tired to live with him. I just want to find away out.

[hurtfull]

Talking to someone can help some and talking about things can help also.But if you don,t mind me asking to u love the guy who wants to marry u .And I mean really love him.If not then don,t marry him.I have been married 2 times.The first was a good man he just wanted his mom more.And number 2 was the deivil.I was beaten,locked up and other things.Right now the only person u should think of is yourself.Because the old saying is true if u don,t care for u who will.contact me any time.more than happy to listen or help.But please don,t hurt youself u leave more pain than u know .my son they say hung hisself in 2008 and I was the one who found him and cut him down and still every day I cry.He was a son and friend to be proud of.