A little about me

Shared experiences of life, and the path that has led you to where you are.

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sunandbutterflies
Posts: 3
Joined: Mon Jul 09, 2018 2:23 pm

A little about me

Postby sunandbutterflies » Mon Jul 09, 2018 2:52 pm

Hello,
I have good days and more difficult ones. While I was in college, I had a stalker who drew Anime pictures of me and would find me on the college campus even when I changed up my routine. He never hurt me, but definitely scared me. A few years ago, I was sexually assaulted by a family member. The sights, smells, and feeling his arousal was a terrible experience. Months of sleepless nights and the weight of the family keeping it a secret for fear that he would commit suicide or no longer be able to care for his wife if the matter were brought to light were overwhelming. Sometimes, I find myself trembling or having to stop myself from having a panic attack because of silly things like a tall man in the room, the smell of Old Spice, or the sound of certain songs. Bad dreams, tears, feelings of shame, and not wanting to be around people happens. A friend said that I seemed like a deer, timid and easily scared off.
On top of that, last summer my 22 year old brother (married to my sister, but very close to the family) died in a tragic motorcycle accident. The images of him in the hospital, the feeling of his hands going cold and stiff, and the funeral are all still very vivid in my mind. Sometimes, I still wake up with bad dreams. Mention of blood transfusions or cross typing at work brings me to a place of tears and back into that ICU room. The trauma of the days that followed and my mother telling me that I was selfish as dirt was sprinkled over the casket still ring in my mind.
Being able to talk with someone who has encountered and helped other people in situations such as mine has been helpful. There are still tough days and likely will be some ahead.

KimmyO
Posts: 12
Joined: Mon Sep 18, 2017 9:10 pm

Re: A little about me

Postby KimmyO » Thu Jul 12, 2018 8:58 pm

Dear sunandbutterflies, the fact that you use such a sweet and hopeful sign-in name is a sign that you see those good times ahead. I am so sorry you have gone thru so much! One tragedy after another is just so much to bear! Obviously, tho you are a strong girl tho! It saddens me that your parents didn't press charges. I don't know circumstances but it's just sad!
Keep on walking away in your mind from that past and moving forward, growing and changing to be even stronger. When I am stuck on negative events I take ginseng, it gets rid of the sticky negative thoughts and emotions, truly does. Also, taking magnesium calms the mind body and spirit, I take it right after dinner to sleep good and feel good the next day. Hope these help you, keep on keeping on, girl! You are stronger than your past!

WickerBrown
Posts: 2
Joined: Fri Jul 13, 2018 1:55 am

Re: A little about me

Postby WickerBrown » Fri Jul 13, 2018 2:00 am

Hi, each one of us encounter problems and challenges but at the end of the day, we have to accept the truth that its part of our lives. Stay positive and believe that everything will be fine sooner or later. Have a good day ahead! :)


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