Fear of Rejection

Joined: 04 Dec 2009 Posts: 83 Location: Florida

What do they call that? Fear of rejection or being ignored. Is there even such a thing? I don't go out of my way for attention but at the same time when i say something in a group and they ignore me i feel like a fixture in the room to place a drink or ashtray on. I spent most of my younger years in my room and my parents would tell me to go out and play.

Life has been hard but i managed to find love and a career i enjoyed. Well the career is gone due to health problems and so here i am again in my room. Ironic in a way only nobody tells me to go out and play anymore.

The latest feeling of rejection (in my mind at least) is people i had such a good repoire with here don't want to listen to me anymore. It's like i've outstayed my welcome. As i said, this may be in my head but what do they call this? I don't know where else on the web to search, i've tried. It also scares me that i may just stop coming here altogether.

I haven't changed my personality lately so i need to find a reason for this. My meds are kicking in and i'm getting sleepy, i need to go.

Sorry to my friends because i feel like i'm whining and i hate that!

Joined: 27 Oct 2009 Posts: 578 Location: U.S.

Sweetie, I don't think anything is wrong with you or that you are being ignored, just sorta comes in waves in chatroom I've noticed that sometimes people ignore you and sometimes they are all over you...and you haven't been posting a lot in the forums that i've seen, so keep posting and i'll bet people will respond.

*hugs* we all feel that way sometimes, like something is wrong with us that makes people treat us or fail to treat us as they do, but all people are just flawed and get caught up in their own dramas sometimes. I know i'm guilty sometimes of posting my own crap and not responding to others, not because something is wrong with them, but it is something wrong with me that makes me unable to focus on another when i've got something going on...

we depressives aren't usually the most social people anyway, and so that might account for some of the feeling of being ignored...some depressives just aren't always responsive to others and often lack social skills 'normals' take for granted...

so *hugs* i'm here and i'll be your friend Smile

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Joined: 04 Dec 2009 Posts: 83 Location: Florida

(((((shatteredhopes)))))

It meant alot to me reading your words. You are so clear in what you mean to say when explaining things. The only time i can somewhat do that is when it is 'not me' i'm talking about. That is why i get so frustrated. As soon as i can afford a therapist i will be running to their office.

So meanwhile, the only thing that makes me feel worthwhile is being there for others and i haven't been able to do that lately it seems. Here i go again, can't explain what's in my head.

What you said about not responding to posts is exactly how it is with me. When you have no focus it is almost impossible to talk to people. When i woke up today i regretted what i had written because it was impulsive and to my way of thinking, selfish of me.

Usually i look at my issues and remind myself that there are so many families & children that have to struggle every day to survive, but when these "spells" come over me i just lose it. Maybe it's the beginning or form of an obsession? That is why i want to find out what disorder aside from depression it might be.

Enough *smack myself*
Thank you ((((shatteredhopes)))) for taking time to read my post and respond & your friendship Smile

Posted: Sun Feb 21, 2010 7:41 pm Post subject: (((((MISTY)))))

hey ((((((((misty))))))),,ive answered your simaler post like this ,,so i wont write to much here ,,,,like my sister says ,,sometimes the forum is like that ,,users may be suffering their pain and not feel up to answering
dont worry my dear freind theres nothing wrong wth you ,,
your part of this big family ,,and we all love you dearly ,,ive posted before and got no replys for a while ,,its fine just the way it goes ,,,,
hope your doing ok ,,we havent chatted for a while ,,hugs love ken xxx
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My lovely wife Fran ,is my whole life ,and in her pain she has supported and never questioned mine ,I must make hers happy and as painless as i have in my power ,,Fran i love you so much ,never doubt it my love ,,,Forever,Boo,,,
xxxxxxxxxx,,

Joined: 18 Apr 2009 Posts: 749 Location: Malaysia

((((((((((((((( Misty )))))))))))))))))

hug you because you are so dear to me

love you
dandelion
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To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all.
- Oscar Wilde

Joined: 29 Jun 2009 Posts: 1554 Location: USA

Misty..... ((((((((((((((((((((Misty))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

Just a hello to you!

I have a fear of rejection sometimes.... but I always try to focus on something else to distract me from it.

Sometimes, I take the "I won't know unless I try" approach.... Or the "So what? I can try again" approach....

It's hard, but we can do it! Wink

Hugs to you!
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~Crystal/Onika

"Nothing starts until you take action."
Sonic from Sonic the Hedgehog (2006)

You have power to choose.

Please, don't take it personally!

Fight for yourself, please; it's essential.

If you'd like to PM me, go right ahead! Smile

Joined: 20 May 2010 Posts: 6

I've always had a fear of rejection. I'm surprised I ever got married in the first place because I was afraid to ask girls out on dates which is usually the first step in getting married Very Happy

I think the Internet helped me give me a voice and place to chat without feeling rejected. Cheer up! It always gets better. -Vega Sinclair, Individual Health Insurance Advisor

Joined: 29 Jun 2010 Posts: 4

Mankind has affected the hardships of war and accustomed disasters. Yet there is one accustomed abhorrence that seems to adumbrate a lot of men: the abhorrence of rejection. Become so bedeviled with functioning, looking, and acting in a prescribed'' address that they become rigid, inflexible, and bankrupt to another behavior.
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Posted: Tue Jun 29, 2010 11:53 am Post subject:

Ok..... I get it. People don't like to be rejected. That's human nature. We all want to be accepted. Misty, I want you to know that here, we don't judge or discriminate. You are safe. You are wanted. You are not alone.

((( big hug ))) sent your way.

Moderator Joined: 06 Jun 2006 Posts: 14362

jessicaKloser

We are a support group here. Please, remember that when you type a reply. We give and receive everyday support. We know enough about depression and rejection.

Thank you

Warmie / Moderator
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“If we admit our depression openly and freely, those around us get from it an experience of freedom rather than the depression itself.”
--- Dr. Rollo May
Sunshine, smiles and love.

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