People talking to me like i'm dirt

[CoronaBorealis]

Hi,

I was wondering whether it is just me... but when I have my up's and down's, I don't know whether the way people talk to me changes or whether it's the way my mind perceives it...

I'm a female and I'm in a long term relationship with another woman. She is fantastic over text and call. Lovey dovey and so sweet, but when i'm with her, her tone of voice is so surreal. I don't know whether she's being a dick with me or whether it's just how my mind perceives it.

Anyone else have issues like this at all?

Please help!!!!

[emily67]

i find that with me, people talk to me like i'm in preschool.

it's like, because you're depressed, it probably means you can't understand adult words.. so i'll speak to you like you're 4

it does frustrate me. a lot

[CoronaBorealis]

Thankyou for the reply. I thought it was just me being fussy.

I find everything that is said with a negative tone of voice frustration and upsetting. My girlfriend told me to not look at her in a certain way (which i didnt know what she was on about) and walked out of the room. Made me feel like utter crap. I didnt know what I did.

She has that tone of voice and personality that I don't know whether she's being serious or not. And I don't know how to handle it mentally unless i shrug it off you know?

[100footpole]

Look at sections 3 through 5 in the Interpersonal Relationships Article on Wikipedia:

3 Stages
4 Relationship Satisfaction
5 Flourishing, budding, blooming, blossoming relationships
5.1 Background
5.1.1 Adult attachment and attachment theory
5.1.2 Romantic love
5.2 Theories and empirical research
5.3 Other perspectives
5.4 Neurobiology of interpersonal connections
5.5 Applications
5.6 Controversies

Rate these sections as to what is most important to your view of relationships. I would love to discuss with you. For me the most important part of the article is the "stages" because you know when you are in a deterioration stage. The key here for me has become getting to a successful rather than resentful termination. This has a lot to do with self-love which I think is the most important part for remaining in the continuation phase.

[porcupine]

I find that some people can be very patronising because of my depression. It doesn't really bother me though. I just find it strange. It's like they think I'm a child or stupid. I don't understand why they are like this.

[LeathaMcDonald]

I think you should not think too much and everything will go as it is decided to. Do not think too much. To know more check this out.

[nenkohai2]

I woudn't be able to pin it down for you, certainly based on my experience. For myself, I tend to withdraw when I'm in a depressive cycle. It could be that people just don't know how to deal with someone with severe or clinical depression. Or, if you're like me (and we joke about it in the family), you may have "resting bitch face." People tell me I often look unhappy or upset when I'm doing just fine. I sometimes say, "sorry, I just have RBF."

I have noticed (because I'm this way), that depressed people can get so far inside their own head, as it were, that they begin to self-victimize and not realize it.

I hope things improve for you.

[100footpole]

Self-awareness of RBF .... what a great strategy for managing depression.

I agree that I am often puzzled when people don't get things that are obvious to me. In addition many people have that attitude "smile and the world smiles with you." When you are in your head and you are depressive, then you are probably doing a little worrying.

A lot of feedback I get is that I'm a nice person who doesn't smile much. RBF. I also have a reputation for being unnecessarily mean and rude. The B in RBF. Control is a big issue for those of us with depression, especially avoiding that feeling of normal people thinking "we can get over it".

On the other hand we do provide empathy and sympathy when we can. Many times we are depressed because the world doesn't work according to the mythology ... people really aren't naturally good, and it seems to me that depressed people realize this, but simply can't embrace their dark side and get on with it.