Lost my job, cant cope

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luckyirishlass
Posts: 5
Joined: Mon Nov 18, 2013 3:41 pm

Lost my job, cant cope

Postby luckyirishlass » Mon Nov 18, 2013 3:52 pm

I recently got let go from my dream job. I was in college for 5 years and worked like a dog all my life to get to where i was. and now im back at square one. everything is a constant battle and im so so so tired of fighting. I wont be on the streets or anything, because ive moved back in with my parents. This is not the life i imagined for myself at 28. i want to go to south korea and leave this country. ive found myself obsessing about their culture.. and i realize its just pure escapism, cause im sick of my country. There are no jobs, all my friends have left to work in oz or canada. I have a boyfriend who loves me very much and knows im going through a hard time. but im just tired of it all...tired of being angry and bitter and tired of feeling down and inadequate. I grew up believing i was going to be an animator, i knew it from the age of 5... and know my boss basically thought i wasnt good enough and fired me. Im not as good as the other aniators out there. i dont know if i will ever be able to hld down a ful time job with my average talent. god i just want to run away.

no_answer
Posts: 57
Joined: Mon Sep 09, 2013 2:24 pm
Location: usa

Postby no_answer » Mon Nov 18, 2013 4:44 pm

Being obsessed about another culture doesn't sound like escapism to me. I think there is a great shortage of people with such an obsession. Don't make your good quality sound so negative, because it is rare (ie valuable overall, even if not valuable to you personally). Make it a goal to get in contact with that obsession (a short visit of sorts to begin with...maybe not now, but soon).
As far as not being the best at what you do: make sure your trying to be perfect doesn't get in the way of being good enough (which you probably are, since you care about your job loss so much and invested a lot into it). You'll always find someone better than yourself, even if you are the best, you could find a way to have had things done a better way.
I myself repeat all of the above to myself, because I'm an aspiring perfectionist escapist just like you.
Don't despair!

Frame
Moderator
Posts: 1081
Joined: Mon Jun 17, 2013 11:25 am
Location: Pennsylvania

Postby Frame » Mon Nov 18, 2013 7:30 pm

When I was in college, as a senior one of my room mates proudly posted every employment rejection letter on his wall. It became a very full wall. It seemed odd at first, like a Zen koan. I've come to realize that he wasn't celebrating rejection, but his effort.

I understand of course you want to be gainfully employed Luckylass, however you have no reason to internalize your bosses judgement of you [I'm not saying you are. I'm just saying, "Keep your chin up."] All too many stories of the most famous creative people include rejection as "sub-par, not good enough, talentless". And these judgements all too often hide intimidation of bosses by the new ideas of younger generations. Keep the dream alive.

BTW Korea is a lot like Poland. The surrounding countries have been fighting over, conquering, over running their borders for many millenniums. It has a rich history but their societal zeitgeist is a bit paranoid of outsiders (North or South).

rpuchalski64
Posts: 5
Joined: Tue Nov 19, 2013 3:46 pm
Location: Pennsylvania

Lost Job

Postby rpuchalski64 » Tue Nov 19, 2013 4:25 pm

I totally understand. I lost a very good job almost three years ago I was employed with the company for over 25 years and have been struggling ever since. I have almost completely destroyed my family financially at this point and the guilt, anger and embarrassment is very difficult. I have had two hospitalizations in the last three months because of it and it feels like I recently hit rock bottom. I know it is time to pick myself up, dust myself off try and right my wrongs and make things better for not just me but my family as well. Sounds so simple but it is not...Hopefully we can all look back soon and say we are in a much better place.....

Frame
Moderator
Posts: 1081
Joined: Mon Jun 17, 2013 11:25 am
Location: Pennsylvania

Postby Frame » Tue Nov 19, 2013 5:29 pm

Amen

rpuchalski64
Posts: 5
Joined: Tue Nov 19, 2013 3:46 pm
Location: Pennsylvania

Postby rpuchalski64 » Tue Nov 19, 2013 5:35 pm

Your right AMEN

Lee UK
Posts: 1
Joined: Thu Jan 23, 2014 6:16 pm
Location: East Sussex

Postby Lee UK » Thu Jan 23, 2014 6:31 pm

I lost my dream job too. I was in a band with a record deal and everything was looking rosy (I'd worked like a dog to get to that point, as you did, luckyirishlass with your animation), and then - for various reasons/due to other people's decisions - it was all over.

A couple of years later, I retrained at college and found a career I liked more.

So, although it is hard to see it at the time, losing a dream job can actually be for the best, in the long run, I mean.

I am not saying this happens to everyone, just that it is my experience of losing something I'd worked m whole life for, only to lose it. Losing it was for the best, I mean.

Maybe you just haven’t found a new pathway yet.

I really hope you do, and good luck.

turtle8378
Posts: 8
Joined: Sat Jan 25, 2014 5:24 pm
Location: United States

can relate

Postby turtle8378 » Sat Jan 25, 2014 6:42 pm

I busted my butt in college, worked a full time job and raised a family, to get to the place I wanted to be. I was successful. Then something broke inside me and I haven't been able to work in 10 years. I tried to go back in 06, but the anxiety was too much for me. I got sick at work everyday for a month before I realized I just couldn't do it.

My plan now is to retire to Thailand. I was going to move after my youngest daughter graduated high school, but she wants my moral support while she's in college so I had to move the date back 4 years.

I live on disability and chose Thailand because I can live like a king on my disability in Thailand.

Dubliner
Posts: 25
Joined: Tue Jan 07, 2014 12:30 pm

Re: can relate

Postby Dubliner » Fri Jan 31, 2014 2:23 pm

turtle8378 wrote:I live on disability and chose Thailand because I can live like a king on my disability in Thailand.


yea il bet....


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