Miscarriage

[windsong]

You learn to stop blaming yourself because you come to realize that you didn't want this. And you would have done everything you could have so that it didn't happen.

And sometimes there just isn't a reason. Sometimes you can do everything right and it still happens.

[CrazyLady17]

Okay thank you!
But how do you learn not to blame yourself? I mean my first miscarriage was in march and I still blame myself for that? I suppose I am just feeling guilty as I could of done more to prevent this for happening.... I don't know. I feel like people judge me for miscarrying, crazy I know.

[CrazyLady17]

Well that's me that's had another miscarriage. Lost the other twin this morning around 9am and now feel so lost. I feel so empty, I feel like it's ally fault, I am the one to blame for all 3 miscarriages!!

I am such a bad, terrible person.
I don't deserve to be alive.

R.I.P baby twins
Mummy loves you.

[CrazyLady17]

Miscarriage number 3! Wow!!

Been told I may not be able to carry full-term ever. That means if I ever get pregnant again, it's more likely I'll miscarry again. Oh my goodness! My life just keeps on getting better and better... NOT!

Feel so upset and heartbroken right now.

[CrazyLady17]

It's all my fault.... That's what's been going through my mind all day today, I killed my third unborn
That makes me a monster... Doesn't it? Yes it does indeed.

Wow.
I'm a monster.

[CrazyLady17]

It's all my fault.
I won't be able to carry full-term, all my fault

[metal bear]

Sorry to hear that Crazylady17 and once again I wish I could be more supportive with my words but I don't know what to say but try not to blame yourself, try your best to keep that chin up and there are a lot of folk on here that are here for you hope this wee message helps even a little bit

[CrazyLady17]

It's okay not your fault, it's all my fault as normal.
But thank you!
Your words are supportive and they means a lot to me.

I wish I could say it's not my fault... But I'm afraid it is

[metal bear]

I am sure that is not your fault and you never asked or wanted this so it cant be your fault keep telling yourself that its not your fault

[CrazyLady17]

No I didn't want this at all; I wanted the baby of course. I wanted to be a mummy so badly
I've been told I might not be able to carry full-term.

Will try.

[metal bear]

If you wanted it badly why can it be your fault that this has happened? it really is an awful thing to be going through and I wouldnt know how I would react but you need to remember that this is not your choice so it isnt your fault!

I hope I have worded this right.

[CrazyLady17]

Yes I know what you mean and don't worry about wording it aha....

Hmm suppose you do have a point there hmm...
But I will still feel like it's all my fault though? If I wasn't this depressed and didn't try to commit suicide I probably would of still been pregnant. But no....

I'm stupid!

[metal bear]

You are anything but stupid!

I think it will be natural to blame yourself but keep telling yourself that it wasn't.

What ifs and the likes won't help you, try not to to go down that road, keep remembering that you are a wonderful person and that even though that you were at a low point you tried to help others at the homeless shelter so that makes you a hell of a good person.

[CrazyLady17]

Thank you.
But I am well damn stupid!!!

Hmm...
I suppose you are right and have a point there.
Thank you.

Yes I did help people at the homeless shelter, I guess it does kinda make me a good person.

[metal bear]

You are not stupid! and deep down you know this !