Trying to be Supportive- What Else Can I Do?

[Wonderwoman97]

Spleefy,
Through research, I've found ways to help my anxiety, in ways that doctors haven't even thought of. I'm big on trying to use natural products (essential oils, etc) and they are things that doctors haven't even heard of before. They've helped tremendously. I am on medication, but I feel like the natural supplements help keep me calm, working in tandem with the medication. I also like to research because this is a topic I'm passionate about and just want to educate myself as much as possible.

And my heart does go out to you about your friend. I'm sorry it ended like that. I do keep you guys in my prayers- that your friend finds peace, and your comfort and that you may find another like him.

Good point about the life chapters and people to befriend. It's true and a good way to look at things. I appreciate you sharing- I need the optimism on days when missing him hits the hardest. If anything, the situation has gotten me to slow down, take better care of my mental and physical health (I'm recovering from a back injury) and work on self-love. It's also been a good check-up on my faith, and made me see what needs to be fixed, strengthened, and where some ideas where just horribly, horribly wrong.

It also helped me see how passionate I am about helping others with mental illnesses. So, the interview went SO WELL! They want me to volunteer as a spokesperson and special events planner! I'm going to visit the agency later next week. I'm so excited. I feel like this is where I need to be. I wouldn't have found it without this situation.

I still feel in my heart and when I pray that my story with my friend isn't over yet. But, as I recently read in a book, "some people need to take their journey on one side of the street and you take yours on the other." So, that's what I'm going to do for now.

[Spleefy]

Hi Wonderwoman97,

I’m so happy for you! It’s wonderful that you are doing something that you passionate about. You are fantastic at making a positive difference to other people’s lives. So I think it’s great that you are spokesperson and events planner… they couldn’t have picked a better person for the role.

It would be wonderful to find a friend that I could connect with like I did him. The way I see it, it is only a matter of time when I find someone, or people, who I will connect with on a deep level. The only difference will be that it will be a healthier relationship.

Of course, I will always miss him, our friendship, and the amazing times we had. Who knows, perhaps he may get himself together and we can work on our friendship. Only time will tell.

Essential oils are fantastic. I sometimes make my own cleaning solutions using essential oils. I use them in a diffuser. I make my own cologne with them. I spray lavender or a blend onto my bed before I sleep. Essentials are not only therapeutic but have great versatility.

You are right… doctors will generally not know, or even advocate, the use of natural products, including essential oils. In my experience, any time I mention the use of a equivalent natural product to what they are prescribing, they will discourage me from using the natural products.

This is why I love that we have options—that is, doctors AND health consultants. It’s good to utilize both options based on the condition and which one your particular situation calls for. The good thing is that both can often be used as a complimentary treatment regimen, which sounds like what you are doing with the supplements and medicine.

I’m glad you can feed off the optimism. It’s so critical, especially when times are hard and the future looks bleak. What helps me to keep as mentally strong, positive and optimistic as possible is to remind myself that it is ONLY a state of mind and a choice. And when you do have your down moments… then that’s okay, too!

The way I try to be is to not punish myself or be hard on myself. I allow myself to feel what I’m feeling, including any sad emotions. But I put everything into perspective, and I flood my mind with positive and loving thoughts. You start to radiate with it and build up a great defense against negativity.

I mentioned in another post about building up a bank account of positive experiences. Everyday, I work towards doing as many positive things aka positive experiences as I can. These don’t need to be extravagant. For example, I picked up supplies today. I count that as a positive experience because I needed the supplies. It was beautiful weather, so I got out of the house—another positive experience.
I also worked on my gardening project today and got a lot done! Another very positive experience—probably the highlight of the day.

I’m creating a forest/cottage theme in my garden, so seeing the results slowly take place is very uplifting and fulfilling.

I also came up with the brilliant idea to gather leaves from the bush to use a first layer of mulch before I put down pine bark on my garden pathways. I figured leaves are good enough for the bush so it’ll be good enough in my garden pathways, particularly in conjunction with bark mulch. Seems trivial, but that was a positive experience for me because I thought of a free resource and have access to infinite leaves for mulch… and I had fun collecting them because I was in nature gathering resources, even if just leaves.

While in the bush, Spleefy and I went for a fun walk and did a training session, which went very well. Another positive experience!

Two brothers from the congregation came by to say hello today. It was a VERY positive experience because I value their friendship and love all my friends and especially spiritual family very much.

I thought I would share this to demonstrate how easy it is for us to flood our day with so many positive experiences, big or small. Each day this builds ups a bank account of positive experiences and it compounds over time. If I really wanted to, I could have created a few more positive experiences today, but I was content with what I accomplished. The garden was my main focus today. Tomorrow will be filled with many more positive experiences—some that are planned, while others I will create on the fly.

I don't think I told you, but I got a puppy several weeks ago and I named him "Spleefy". He is now 17 weeks old. I got him when he was 10 weeks. My days can't but be filled with positive experiences with him. I research and train him myself, as well as take him to puppy school once a week for the socialization and additional training techniques or tips. It has been very rewarding to see how far he has come with house training and obedience training since I got him.

The first few weeks was a nightmare lol. I've never raised a puppy before, so had no idea what I was doing. For the first couple of weeks or so, I was lucky to get only a few hours sleep. But things are excellent now! I study and research obedience training everyday, so things are much more structured and my training techniques have been highly effective with rapid, lasting results. It helps that he is a quick learner, too.

I'm actually thoroughly enjoying learning dog obedience training. It is incredibly fun and rewarding.

I saw a lot of posts on here about "pet therapy". I did some research, and chose to get a golden (I call them "vanilla") pure bred Labrador from a reputable breeder. My only regret is that I didn't do this sooner!

The journey with my beautiful boy has been amazing so far. We have many years of adventures awaiting us! I'm excited because I can finally take him out in public since last Friday, now that he is fully vaccinated and protected. I was getting frustrated keeping him home. It feels great to take him out in public.

I like that passage from the book you read. I think it’s great that you are working on your own journey. Please keep sharing your journey in life and keep us up to date. I’ll do the same.