giving up

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hughesy
Posts: 5
Joined: Mon Oct 29, 2018 4:10 pm

giving up

Postby hughesy » Mon Oct 29, 2018 5:20 pm

Hi, im a 15 year old girl and i just need some advice. Around 4 years ago i started having really negative thoughts about everything, i started being very suicidal and have been self harming since. I just dont see a future worth waiting for and i hate how the world is. I always feel so guilty that i have a good safe life when other people are dying because of rich idiots. Ive always wanted to devote my life to helping change human rights and wars but im sick of people telling me its too big a job and i wont be able to do it because i have no confidence for speaking in public. Im just giving up on the idea but there's nothing else i want to do so why carry on?

I also get really stressed whenever im around people and im so self conscious i cant even do anything in front of people. Everyone thinks im just quiet but really i have loads to say but im too worried that people will just judge me. I sort of hate being around people but then i feel so alone at the same time.

I tries telling a couple of my close friends about my self harming and other issues last year because id just had enough. One of them didn't want to talk about it because it made her upset and the other thought it would just magically disappear and didn't really care at all. That just made me feel so alone because i had always been there for them but they didn't actually care when it was the other way round. Ive now just lost faith in everything amd i dont have the confidence to tell anyone higher up like a teacher. My parents isn't an option either because they wouldn't understand and it all started when i lost faith in god and started thinking about life but they are mega catholic so dont know this and i cant make myself tell them. Ive never actually been diagnosed with anything obviously because I've not told people so i dont even know what's wrong with me. Just dont know what to do anymore.

Golda Dilema
Posts: 31
Joined: Sun Aug 19, 2018 12:51 am

Re: giving up

Postby Golda Dilema » Tue Oct 30, 2018 2:38 am

It would do you good if you would be still and relfect on your life. Remember that God loves you and He wants the best life for you. Talk to him once again. Pour out your heart to him because he cares for you and he has all the answers and solutions.

You are important and you matter to the world around you. People need you and so help them as you can and as you see the need even though you are still young. God has given you the ability and the talents to shine and help.

Do activities that make you happy so long as they won't do you any harm. Activities like exercising, listening to good music, volunteering, watchiing good films, doing hobbies and the like.

Your life is important so live it to the fullest and enjoy too.

j2415
Posts: 64
Joined: Thu Jun 01, 2017 8:37 am

Re: giving up

Postby j2415 » Tue Oct 30, 2018 11:45 am

Hi- You have a beautiful heart because you think of helping others. You are young and you can do many things to make difference in this world so please stay strong and please don't think of giving up. You are not alone, we are here and we care for you.

Have you tried talking with your school counselor. If not, please try to do so and I hope you can get the help you need.

The Bible says to give all our worries to God because He cares for all of us. I pray that you will give all your worries and concerns to Him and you will experience peace that surpasses all understanding. God loves you so much, I pray that you will trust Him again. Take care of yourself and remember that I am with you in prayers. God bless.

hughesy
Posts: 5
Joined: Mon Oct 29, 2018 4:10 pm

Re: giving up

Postby hughesy » Tue Oct 30, 2018 12:52 pm

Thanks so much guys. It really helps to know that someone cares.

Dday104
Posts: 1
Joined: Mon Oct 29, 2018 3:53 pm

Re: giving up

Postby Dday104 » Tue Oct 30, 2018 2:10 pm

Hi Hughesy, I am new here as well but felt compelled to respond to you. First I'm going to tell you that as a parent of a 16 yr old son your feelings believe it or not are shared by so many your age. That is not in any way meant to be condescending but rather I need you to understand that you are not alone with how you are feeling. Being a teenager alone is one of the most difficult phases in life for all of us who have been there or are going through it. It's really not a fair age because it's a time when you are trying things on to see how it feels and what fits so to speak and yet it's also a time where you feel most uncomfortable in your own skin, self doubt and recrimination because it's also the most awkward time in life as well. Many of my son's female friends cut and I thought it was a female thing (admittedly I didn't know much about it) until my son actually recently did it and I was horrified as he has many friends, is very social and has a good home life. I talked to him about it and did some research specifically into cutting. You know why he did it? You probably do. He did it to feel. It was something even in his "normal" life that he could control in a world where there is unpredictability. What I am trying to tell you is that you are valuable and you are most certainly not alone. Your best years are ahead of you, they really are. When you are in school walking the halls really take a look at people. Everyone there has something they are going through, everyone! So you are not alone and you are validated in how you feel but don't EVER give up. Find someone to talk to.

RustyTavern
Posts: 58
Joined: Fri Jul 13, 2018 7:15 pm

Re: giving up

Postby RustyTavern » Sun Nov 04, 2018 9:48 am

I would guess that you have had some kind of child abuse; such abuse is very subtle, often not malicious, always complicated like denial of a hobby.

Suicide is never an option. God won't help you but Guy Ritchie might (one day) ;-)

Yea, that's a riddle like life.

Get a full medical- they're unlikely to find a cause (especially in the UK) but you might be lucky for instance: fibromylagia/hyperuricaemia

Is there a cause? Bereavement? Ugliness? Low self-worth? Childhood abuse?

Once you have the cause then address it. You have to. This Life is not a practice whether there is Heaven or Hell (I can show you a picture of Hell), you have to.

Life is not about being happy; understand that.

Life is about struggle 'n' strife; how you deal with it and how the energy you control is thus improved. Try to understand this statement with all its inherent ramifications, lateral nuances & implications.

lovingladyo4
Posts: 20
Joined: Mon May 22, 2017 9:06 am

Re: giving up

Postby lovingladyo4 » Mon Nov 05, 2018 10:42 am

Hi sweetheart, I am so glad to meet you. I wish we could sit down over a bowl of ice cream and talk about life, the ups and downs we face, and how to work through them. Everyone has their struggles and challenges, and sometimes all you need is one person who can listen and respond with unconditional love - someone who believes in you and understands your heart.

I think your ideas for becoming active with human rights is a fabulous and admirable goal! I can tell you are extremely passionate about people, so I'm not surprised it pulls at your heart and wants to stir you into action. There are so many ways to let your voice be heard - you are not confined to public speaking only - so please be open to other options that match your personality and style of communicating. Just like you wrote out your feelings here, you can begin writing your thoughts on this topic in the same way.

Keep a "Human Rights" journal or notebook, and as thoughts pop into your mind, write them down. It's an easy way to collect ides you may someday want to share with your community either in a local newspaper, school papers, college bulletin boards, groups, church bulletins, online forums, as feature articles in a magazine, an online blog, and things like that. I read all the time of websites looking for writers on various topics. Explore these options after you get some material down on paper.

The tendency to want to self harm is pretty serious honey, so please don't ignore getting help so the problem doesn't escalate. You may already know what is the root cause of feeling this way, and if not addressed, it could do more harm, and you don't want that. If your parents, friends, and school administrators are not emotionally available for you to speak with, and since you bring up the mention of God, my suggestion is to seek out a pastor or member of a Bible based and faith based church. There are so many wonderful loving people in these kinds of churches that will not judge you or make you feel worse, but rather offer you hope and encouragement. Many churches have youth pastors who spend time with people your age all the time - so they know what you are going through.

There is a difference between Bible based churches and Catholic churches so you'll want to make sure you understand the difference before you call around. Don't be afraid honey, have a list of questions prepared, and even what you will say when the secretary answers the phone. You don't have to stay stuck, but it might take a little bit of time and effort to connect with someone close by who is willing to sit down and hear what you have to say.

Thanks for letting me share my thoughts and I hope some of this helps.

hughesy
Posts: 5
Joined: Mon Oct 29, 2018 4:10 pm

Re: giving up

Postby hughesy » Mon Nov 05, 2018 11:01 am

Thanks. I have always found that writing things down helps me so I think I will follow your suggestion.

Rachelm2535
Posts: 11
Joined: Wed Dec 20, 2017 3:24 pm

Re: giving up

Postby Rachelm2535 » Fri Nov 16, 2018 1:11 pm

You are not alone! I understand it gets overwhelming when we look at the state of the world but there are still so many amazing people out here and if we all quit attempting to make a better world. I know I get overwhelmed very easily, the only thing that focuses me and calms my soul is my faith in Jesus. I hold to His hope and know He is still in control. Don’t give up! Focus on hope. Hurting yourself only allows all the evil in the world to win. You are so loving and kind to think of the state of our world so become a world changer. Find someone to help....youth groups, church, school. Don’t give up! I am praying fo you - Rachel


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