The downs, ups, downs and downs of Jack.

Shared experiences of life, and the path that has led you to where you are.

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Jtw
Posts: 64
Joined: Sat Mar 02, 2019 9:58 pm

The downs, ups, downs and downs of Jack.

Postby Jtw » Sun Mar 03, 2019 12:40 am

I had a weird childhood and it left me a bit screwed up. My parents aren't good people. It could have been worse and I'm not complaining about it. It's just how it was.
I had a girlfriend that I liked but she was schizophrenic. I don't think she was anywhere near as bad as they said she was and I worked with her to get off the medication. In the end, it became clear this wasn't going to change. She wanted to be ill, she gave in to it. She became homicidal and tried to kill someone, a child. They drugged her up and she essentially went away, there was nothing left of the person she used to be. She's basically dead but there's this walking insult to her memory staggering around.
I have a weird life and a lot of strange things happen. That led me to meet strange people. I tried to help them, and god knows they needed help! But I soon came to realise I couldn't.
I went from one bad job to the next, picking up a few friends, getting by day to day. Life got worse, things got worse. I had several girlfriends and those relationships didn't go well. One was a cocaine addict, another was the daughter of a wanted terrorist.
I lost my job and ended up in a charity. That went horribly badly. I had no idea how corrupt they were. I was constantly fighting for my job against them. In the end, I got myself diagnosed with depression, the first time I admitted it to myself, I guess. I got sick-leave and went looking for a new job. I worked in pawnbroking for a while. It's a horrible thing and it weighed heavily on me. I ended up as a regional auditor for a small company. I left a large company after suing them for misleading practices and outright lying to customers.
I was made redundant, lost my job, my home and pretty much everything.
Eventually, one day I looked at my dad. I realised the only thing in the world that really scared me was ending up like him. I decided that England wasn't for me anymore. I had already planned my escape!
My plan wasn't a terribly good one. I strapped everything I owned to a motorcycle and rode 30k miles overland through 5 warzones and 23 countries. I finally ended up in a 3rd world place in Asia.
I settled in and found work teaching. It turned out I really like teaching. It's a weird place, the locals are not smart, but incredibly arrogant so nothing really works properly. The foreigners are mostly just exploiting them so you don't meet many good people at all.
Still, I built a life. I'm a writer and finally had time to practice my craft. I self-published on Amazon and wrote a best-seller. That is picked up by a proper publisher now so my career is starting up properly. I rented scooters, and had the most popular rental company in the country.
I met a girl, built a life. All was good.
She got pregnant and it all unravelled. She got sick, as it turned out, and started doing very strange things. Over the course of the last 3 years, i lost around 50k because of her.
I'm now broke, my company is gone and I don't see much of my son. We split up and I'm alone in town, all my friends have left.
Most days, like today, I sit in a coffee shop alone and just write. I'm struggling to even do that, right now!

But it's temporary. Yes, i have depression and some days it's bad. Last weekend I had to go out for dinner. I struggled for 3 hours to leave the house, just not able to decide what to do. That isn't like me. I know I'll beat this and I know the future will be alright. I just have to get through the present!

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