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hey

Posted: Thu Sep 06, 2018 10:29 pm
by rak1588
I've been dealing with depression for a while, trying to hide it but I think some people can see it.
I am very socially awkward, get stressed easily, and get anxiety attacks over the smallest things. I tried to be a grown up, and did the grown up thing buying my first house. Thinking that would help. Its just added more stress and more anxiety.
I am 30 years old and have not had a true relationship with any girls. I don't know what to say to them. I tried online dating for years, no success. When I finally think I found someone, she wants to talk on the phone with me, she tries to sell me something.
I am in a dead end job, I make decent money but I am working 70-80 hours a week. Its a sales job so I have to put on a happy face and deal with jerks and people that they think they know everything, and have to deal with customer satisfaction scores which the company isn't making easy on us and I lose money from that.
I have had suicidal thoughts, a lot of them actually. Every time I do, I keep saying its not the right time (weddings and other "happy" events are happening in my family).
I know I don't have it as bad as some. But I don't know where to go. I'm scared to tell my family, they worry over everything. I'm scared to go to my friends about this. I'm just tired of it.

Re: hey

Posted: Fri Sep 07, 2018 3:49 am
by Golda Dilema
Hi! You need to rest and relax. What you are going through is not permanent. Good things will come your way. Do not lose hope becausr you were born to be happy. You need to be happy once again and you can be happy. What are the activities that make you happy? So long as they won't do you harm, it will be good for you if you do them like listening to good music, aromatherapy, watching good or funny films, eating, shopping, exercising, doing hobbies and the like.

Remember to solve your problems one at a time. You are young and you need to enjoy your life. Pursue happiness. Pursue peace.

Re: hey

Posted: Sun Sep 09, 2018 9:58 pm
by flip00008
Hey! Sorry this is going on... I have an idea how you are feeling because I feel the same way a lot. I tend to worry about small things and the worry turns to fear and seems to control every thought. My sons health was in rough shape around 2 years ago... He is doing great now, but I tend to worry that he will get back in the shape he was. The only thing that gets me through... Is prayer. I want you to know that I am praying for you and the situation you are in. Hope to hear from you soon. I also found some articles you may want to check out. https://bit.ly/2hcTFzT

Re: hey

Posted: Sun Sep 09, 2018 11:57 pm
by littlestarsmum
Welcome aboard, friend!
I’m so sorry to hear about your struggles. I know how difficult and frustrating it must be for you. Depression is a very complex issue that deserves personal and in-depth attention. Putting an end to your life will never solve your problems. Are you seeing a therapist? It’s best to seek out professional counseling without any delay. I just said a prayer for you, and I hope that God will provide the comfort and help you need at this time. Remember that your life is precious and I do believe there’s hope for a bright future. Stay strong. Sending hugs & wishing you well!

Re: hey

Posted: Fri Sep 14, 2018 5:20 pm
by rak1588
I haven't talked to any doctors or therapist about it. I'm scared, same reason I haven't told my parents.

I am having panic/anxiety attacks a lot. I don't know what to do, and I don't know how to talk to the doctor or anyone in person about this.