I just need someone

Shared experiences of life, and the path that has led you to where you are.

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TryingToGetBy
Posts: 2
Joined: Tue Dec 05, 2017 6:47 am

I just need someone

Postby TryingToGetBy » Tue Dec 05, 2017 7:06 am

Hello, this is my first time ever posting anything about my problems, but sometimes I cant control my feelings and my thoughts and I just silently breakdown. Insecurities plague my mind which complicates my social life, I tend to be with people but in the end of the day I always end up alone with no one to truly call a friend. Im a very loud person in school but often times I'd just shut down and become silent, especially with my family which I think contributed on my insecurities. My brother has never been a "brother" to me and my mom while she's caring she can be too much and plain ignorant to anyones feelings but herself. I feel like I have no one to talk to I cant cry cause ive cried too much when I was young, labeling me a crybaby and a pussy. Too make things worse Im struglling with who I really am (if you know what I mean) I think Im falling for someone with whom I know I have zero chance and all we'll ever be is just friends, it pains me when I think of that and that makes everyday so sad, I can barely study and concentrate. I want to be alone but at the same time I want someone to hold me and just tell me everythings ok. I just want someone to understand that everthing can be ugly in this world and that it won't be any good, I just want someone out there to reassure me that it's alright to feel this way because I'm starting to wallow and drown on my own sadness and I don't know how to stop.

MilchBubi
Posts: 4
Joined: Tue Dec 05, 2017 10:57 am

Re: I just need someone

Postby MilchBubi » Tue Dec 05, 2017 11:08 am

I know, it can really suck :cry: . But this world can be so good! I just need to find out how.

spanky_88007
Posts: 1
Joined: Wed Dec 06, 2017 9:23 pm

Re: I just need someone

Postby spanky_88007 » Wed Dec 06, 2017 9:38 pm

Trying, you are not alone in feeling what you feel. I am 38 years old and have been dealing with such feelings pretty much all of my life. I still have really bad days. My mind creates situations that simply do not exist. I assume things that could not be more incorrect. I feel as though my entire world is crashing down on me. Trying, do you have some kind of release or hobby that you enjoy? For me, it's bicycling. It helps me be in the moment, and it works out all my frustrations. Music helps me. Sometimes going for a walk gets it done. I wish I could tell you that parents get less frustrating as time goes by, but that's not true. There's no shame in crying. I'm a big dude, 6'2", 225 pounds, and I cry when I feel I need to. It's therapeutic, and not at all shameful. If we weren't supposed to cry sometimes, why do we have tear ducts? Trying, though you feel alone, you aren't. And you came here. This is my first post ever to this forum. I'm in a funky place, myself, and I suppose there is some comfort - albeit, bittersweet - in knowing that others are going through tough times, too. It is OK to feel this way for a time. If you feel like this non stop, you might consider counseling. My father took his own life a couple of years ago, and I turned to counseling and anti anxiety/depression meds to level myself out. It's something I should have done over a decade ago, Trying. But, I was worried about being labeled a pussy. I'm not sure how old you are - I'm assuming late teens, early 20s. That is a really, really hard time of life. I hope you have some good friends, Trying. If you do, laugh with them, cry with them, yell, scream, play video games, cuss, and as I said before... be in the moment. If you're like me, when you have alone time, you sit and overthink things, and mountains you should climb somehow make their way onto your shoulders.

Take care, Trying. Keep on keeping on, no matter how hard things get. Remember that every struggle you get through is one more struggle you don't have to get through.

Iammeanduareme
Posts: 11
Joined: Sat Sep 23, 2017 8:50 pm

Re: I just need someone

Postby Iammeanduareme » Fri Dec 15, 2017 12:41 am

Well I suppose the only way to overcome your insecurities is by getting out of your comfort zone, try to make changes in your life, I want to say the platitude think more positively but really if you put in work in yourself, then I'm sure you'll be pleasantly surprised at yourself and how great it was to switch things up a little or try new things, like new music, haircut, clothes, jobs, education, traveling, food, anything really.. I hope challenging yourself may sound easier said than done.
You are struggling with yourself and feeling overwhelmed by the emotions you are bottling up inside. I can tell you without being Dr. Phil that forcing yourself to never release these emotions can be harmful to your body on how stressed you are day to day. I think its admirable when someone who regardless of obstacles, tackles their own problems head on and faces them even if they're afraid, bravery or courage.
About your "Real Self", I can't help you with that, I'm gay myself and I haven't came out despite people knowing I play for the other side. I think really its up to you when u feel your ready to have that conversation with your friends and family. If there is one advice I can tell you is be understanding and patient with your family should you ever have discuss your business with anyone because of course coming out isn't exactly something minuet, so time will tell if they have become more understanding because I was terrified at 18 thinking my parents would legit hate me be disappointed, my friends would hate bat me up, ostracize me. im 21 and honestly my parents.. they probably are a bit tad bit disappointed deep down but they still know and treat me well for the most part even suspecting I possibly am full blown gay. I never had too many friends to begin with but I still have the same friends and even my high school crush since since day 1 of high school says sup to me knowing im gay so my life is still the same for the most part. (I wish I could show u a pic of him, he is like 10/10)
For your friends, I hope they receive the news well too. If your naturally a jolly person or cool person to be around, I'm sure ppl will receive the news quite well but regardless let's hope for the best results and wish u the best in all you endeavors


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