09/05/11

Permalink 07:46:52 am, Categories: General, 251 words

I spent the day yesterday and the baby come running to me when I got there. I was surprised by it, gave me a hug and kiss. Later she even spent time with me at the sand box and near the pool. We talked, ( she knows a lot of words now) and she sorta got the understanding that she had to wait till the Sun came up today. Cute. The older boy played cards with me. I guess I connected with them and I feel better about that as I was not doing well interacting with them. I saw my niece's mom to and felt better about that too. I'm overwhelmed with the business stuff I have to deal with. I'm scared about finding the new Med. Doc. I did get my Lunesta back and am really glad of that. I'm not sure if I wrote about my new work for Fall/Winter. It will suck as it has so much overtime built in without a lot of brake time. I will be tiring and I don't look forward to it at all. I'm not sure how to work stuff out. I just want nothing to be going on. I'm home today and have to get ready for work tomorrow, but I have a lot done already and will be able to just dream most of the day. I seem to rather be home doing that then being out in the world. The Depression is mild, and would rather die still.

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Their My Thoughts, I Made Them

Yes, there just thoughts! Some are irrational(most really). Yes, the thought provokes a feeling. Yes, the feeling provokes a reaction. Change the thought, changes the feeling, changes the reaction! How Simple! Be the "Watcher" of your thoughts. Let them move through your mind. Some say like "puffy white clouds in the Blue sky." Well, what if Self-help books and Cognitive Behavioral Therapy don't cut the mustard? What's left? Hope, Faith..........? It all has to come up and out some how, some way. Even when moving forward goes down and across it's still movement. I have to find my voice somehow.

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